Tag Archives: I Was a Mormon

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Simon Southerton Was a Mormon, an Ex-Mormon Profile Spotlight

Simon was an active, believing member serving as a Bishop. While reading the Ensign he came across some interesting statements regarding the Flood which led him to research more about it. He came upon “volumes of scientific research” that contradicted things he believed at church. Then he applied his own scientific training in molecular genetics …

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President Nelson Embellishing Stories to Promote Faith – Armed Robbery and Faulty Gun to His Head

Russel M. Nelson and his second wife, Wendy, were involved in an altercation in Mozambique, Africa while visiting the mission home in 2009. The mission home is alarmingly robbed by assailants. When first reported there is nothing involving criminals targeting church leaders. The only injuries mentioned in the reports were the Mission President’s wife having …

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"I’m a Family Physician in Minnesota, but I grew up in Idaho in a community that was predominantly Mormon. I never questioned the historical claims of the Church and trusted all my Church leaders that what I was taught was true. All my major life decisions including family, education, and finances were heavily influenced by my desire to gain salvation by following the rules and policies of the church. I was a Mormon." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"I’m a Family Physician in Minnesota, but I grew up in Idaho in a community that was predominantly Mormon. I never questioned the historical claims of the Church and trusted all my Church leaders that what I was taught was true. All my major life decisions including family, education, and finances were heavily influenced by my desire to gain salvation by following the rules and policies of the church. I was a Mormon." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"The leaders of the church couldn’t answer my questions and told me to keep believing. I made the decision to leave and haven’t looked back. There have been new challenges with leaving, but being able to be honest with myself has created a new found peace. I’m living in the here and now, and not living out of fear. Having the courage to break the generational Mormon chain is difficult, but allows for growth, happiness and authenticity. As a physician I’ve been trained to research and investigate, to seek truth from reliable sources. I also believe in faith, hope, honesty, transparency, justice and truth." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"The leaders of the church couldn’t answer my questions and told me to keep believing. I made the decision to leave and haven’t looked back. There have been new challenges with leaving, but being able to be honest with myself has created a new found peace. I’m living in the here and now, and not living out of fear. Having the courage to break the generational Mormon chain is difficult, but allows for growth, happiness and authenticity. As a physician I’ve been trained to research and investigate, to seek truth from reliable sources. I also believe in faith, hope, honesty, transparency, justice and truth." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"Having the courage to break the generational Mormon chain is difficult, but allows for growth, happiness and authenticity. As a physician I’ve been trained to research and investigate, to seek truth from reliable sources. I also believe in faith, hope, honesty, transparency, justice and truth." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"Having the courage to break the generational Mormon chain is difficult, but allows for growth, happiness and authenticity. As a physician I’ve been trained to research and investigate, to seek truth from reliable sources. I also believe in faith, hope, honesty, transparency, justice and truth." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"I suffered from severe scrupulosity (religious OCD) and felt I was constantly a sinner. I never realized that the Church membership made up less than 0.2% of the world population, and the amount of active believers was far less than that. In my late 20s, I began reading the Church’s “Gospel Topics Essays”, and quickly began feeling uneasy with the history of the Church. I spent 5 years reading everything I could about the history of the Church, Joseph Smith, and The Book of Mormon." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"I suffered from severe scrupulosity (religious OCD) and felt I was constantly a sinner. I never realized that the Church membership made up less than 0.2% of the world population, and the amount of active believers was far less than that. In my late 20s, I began reading the Church’s “Gospel Topics Essays”, and quickly began feeling uneasy with the history of the Church. I spent 5 years reading everything I could about the history of the Church, Joseph Smith, and The Book of Mormon." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"This lead to depression - it’s difficult to pretend to believe something you think is hurtful, especially when you fear losing your wife and children if you decide to leave the church. The Church has an undeniable history of racism and sexism. The Church has over 100 Billion in assets and gives an infinitesimally small portion to the poor." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"This lead to depression - it’s difficult to pretend to believe something you think is hurtful, especially when you fear losing your wife and children if you decide to leave the church. The Church has an undeniable history of racism and sexism. The Church has over 100 Billion in assets and gives an infinitesimally small portion to the poor." - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"Suggestions about how to deal with my still-Mormon family? Be kind and patient. If they decide to leave, it will be on their terms. Don’t be a know-it-all, but encourage them to read and learn. I wish I would have had more guidance" - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"Suggestions about how to deal with my still-Mormon family? Be kind and patient. If they decide to leave, it will be on their terms. Don’t be a know-it-all, but encourage them to read and learn. I wish I would have had more guidance" - Daniel Johnson, https://wasmormon.org/profile/danieljohnson/
"I learned about confession and that any sexual sin had to be confessed to a Bishop. Like most young boys, I masturbated but I felt extremely guilty, fearful, and ashamed every time. My mind would obsess about how bad this was and that I was now one button push away from God sending me to Hell. I had to confess. The first time I went to the Bishop I engaged in some small talk and then sort of 'oh by the way' mentioned it to him; said it wasn't a problem anymore. He confirmed by asking 'but it's not a problem now' and I said no it's not. What I didn't realize was that I had felt this huge relief known as negative reinforcement, similar to compulsions and addictions providing temporary relief from emotional pain." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"I learned about confession and that any sexual sin had to be confessed to a Bishop. Like most young boys, I masturbated but I felt extremely guilty, fearful, and ashamed every time. My mind would obsess about how bad this was and that I was now one button push away from God sending me to Hell. I had to confess. The first time I went to the Bishop I engaged in some small talk and then sort of 'oh by the way' mentioned it to him; said it wasn't a problem anymore. He confirmed by asking 'but it's not a problem now' and I said no it's not. What I didn't realize was that I had felt this huge relief known as negative reinforcement, similar to compulsions and addictions providing temporary relief from emotional pain." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"My emotional pain was not because of some reality, it was painful because of what I was taught about sex, the severe penalties, and the unconscious conclusions I made about the author of these laws and punishments. I was well on my way to a performance-driven sense of self-worth and toxic perfectionism. When I lived well, which was probably most of the time, that didn't matter. What mattered was that I did something 'wrong'. I told myself 'that's the last time' hundreds of times and my self-doubt and self-hate grew deeper with each broken promise. I was drowning in shame and thought I deserved it. This was not just a cognitive process; it was experiential, highly emotional, and triggered stress responses of 'freeze' and 'fawning'. I'd give up and feel discouraged or run to the Bishop hoping he would forgive me. God's forgiveness wasn't a big deal to me, it was the Bishop who had the power as God's agent to act on His behalf." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"My emotional pain was not because of some reality, it was painful because of what I was taught about sex, the severe penalties, and the unconscious conclusions I made about the author of these laws and punishments. I was well on my way to a performance-driven sense of self-worth and toxic perfectionism. When I lived well, which was probably most of the time, that didn't matter. What mattered was that I did something 'wrong'. I told myself 'that's the last time' hundreds of times and my self-doubt and self-hate grew deeper with each broken promise. I was drowning in shame and thought I deserved it. This was not just a cognitive process; it was experiential, highly emotional, and triggered stress responses of 'freeze' and 'fawning'. I'd give up and feel discouraged or run to the Bishop hoping he would forgive me. God's forgiveness wasn't a big deal to me, it was the Bishop who had the power as God's agent to act on His behalf." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"I felt a warm feeling when I learned that God appeared in these last days and would actually visit a young boy. The picture and the story created a feeling of comfort and awe. I was baptized shortly thereafter. I felt at home. The church gave me certainty; a turnkey franchise to Heaven - exclusive distribution of salvation, knowledge, and priesthood power. No other churches could do this for me. I had it made. I felt safe." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"I felt a warm feeling when I learned that God appeared in these last days and would actually visit a young boy. The picture and the story created a feeling of comfort and awe. I was baptized shortly thereafter. I felt at home. The church gave me certainty; a turnkey franchise to Heaven - exclusive distribution of salvation, knowledge, and priesthood power. No other churches could do this for me. I had it made. I felt safe." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"Today, I'm learning about GRACE. Grace makes unconditional, unselfish love the highest value and obedience is not to a system; it's not outside-in or in reaction to fear of punishment or hope for reward (external motivation). Grace and love show us who God is, who we are, and that all people have great worth. Faith in Christ is central, not an organization or prophet. If our paradigm of God changes from an authoritarian God to a charitable God, we can see ourselves differently and want to live differently - acting freely and not being compelled." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"Today, I'm learning about GRACE. Grace makes unconditional, unselfish love the highest value and obedience is not to a system; it's not outside-in or in reaction to fear of punishment or hope for reward (external motivation). Grace and love show us who God is, who we are, and that all people have great worth. Faith in Christ is central, not an organization or prophet. If our paradigm of God changes from an authoritarian God to a charitable God, we can see ourselves differently and want to live differently - acting freely and not being compelled." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"The certainty I was given also became my comfort zone. It wasn't until many years later that I realized how I limited my personal vision of what life could be because I didn't realize I needed more than these prescribed steps to Heaven. Life was more than salvation and safety. I was living in Pleasantville and wanted to please my fellow members and local leaders. I was codependent before I knew what that meant." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"The certainty I was given also became my comfort zone. It wasn't until many years later that I realized how I limited my personal vision of what life could be because I didn't realize I needed more than these prescribed steps to Heaven. Life was more than salvation and safety. I was living in Pleasantville and wanted to please my fellow members and local leaders. I was codependent before I knew what that meant." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"These are some of my experiences with the Mormon brand. Some will blame my OCD and yes, that played some role but let's look at the authoritarian leadership style, the 'always right' hierarchical decisions, the high-control 'systems' like mandatory confession for forgiveness, courts of love, temple marriage in order to be with family, and control over knowledge and learning not approved by First Presidency." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"These are some of my experiences with the Mormon brand. Some will blame my OCD and yes, that played some role but let's look at the authoritarian leadership style, the 'always right' hierarchical decisions, the high-control 'systems' like mandatory confession for forgiveness, courts of love, temple marriage in order to be with family, and control over knowledge and learning not approved by First Presidency." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"I was scripted, programmed. The software of my head was installed because I didn't have the expertise or knowledge to write the program like prophets. They knew what was best for me. I was a nervous kid as far as I remember but anxiety when to a whole new level in my experiences with the church." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"I was scripted, programmed. The software of my head was installed because I didn't have the expertise or knowledge to write the program like prophets. They knew what was best for me. I was a nervous kid as far as I remember but anxiety when to a whole new level in my experiences with the church." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"My mission took anxiety to a whole new level. I didn't want to burn up with guilt or be unworthy. This was the beginning of OCD - the pathological kind, not the movie kind! When I was in the mission field, I obsessed every day about sin and worthiness. I never felt worthy enough. I suffered terribly." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"My mission took anxiety to a whole new level. I didn't want to burn up with guilt or be unworthy. This was the beginning of OCD - the pathological kind, not the movie kind! When I was in the mission field, I obsessed every day about sin and worthiness. I never felt worthy enough. I suffered terribly." - John, https://wasmormon.org/profile/drjohn/
"The Brethren, as they are sometimes referred to, appeal rather to faith and prayer over real world evidence (or lack thereof) as the ultimate authority to determine the authenticity of the Book of Mormon. In actuality, they really don't have much of a choice. In this they are safe since subjective methods of faith and prayer cannot be scientifically scrutinized. Which begs the question; why have Book of Mormon apologists in the first place?" - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"The Brethren, as they are sometimes referred to, appeal rather to faith and prayer over real world evidence (or lack thereof) as the ultimate authority to determine the authenticity of the Book of Mormon. In actuality, they really don't have much of a choice. In this they are safe since subjective methods of faith and prayer cannot be scientifically scrutinized. Which begs the question; why have Book of Mormon apologists in the first place?" - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"When the need to believe in the Book of Mormon is removed it is easily seen as a product of its time. The fact that it speaks of divinity does not make it divine. When read in context of the 19th century social landscape the Book of Mormon story becomes a melodrama of the era. When compared to verbiage and text of contemporary works the Book of Mormon emerges as an amalgam of political and religious sermon." - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"When the need to believe in the Book of Mormon is removed it is easily seen as a product of its time. The fact that it speaks of divinity does not make it divine. When read in context of the 19th century social landscape the Book of Mormon story becomes a melodrama of the era. When compared to verbiage and text of contemporary works the Book of Mormon emerges as an amalgam of political and religious sermon." - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"Even the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints defeat their own scholars by making no official endorsement of any of the contrived "evidence" offered by LDS apologists that infer the Book of Mormon is valid. Any apologist organization of the Church, official or arm chair, hedges their articles and contributions with disclaimers that the opinion stated is that of the author alone. The hesitant lack of an official endorsement is the worst indictment of all." - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"Even the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints defeat their own scholars by making no official endorsement of any of the contrived "evidence" offered by LDS apologists that infer the Book of Mormon is valid. Any apologist organization of the Church, official or arm chair, hedges their articles and contributions with disclaimers that the opinion stated is that of the author alone. The hesitant lack of an official endorsement is the worst indictment of all." - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"I have a two year technical degree and work in the ammonia refrigeration industry and hold a national certification in that field. It does not qualify me as a Book of Mormon scholar. Then again, it does not take a scholar to defeat the Book of Mormon, or the believers and apologists that support it. I was a Mormon." - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"I have a two year technical degree and work in the ammonia refrigeration industry and hold a national certification in that field. It does not qualify me as a Book of Mormon scholar. Then again, it does not take a scholar to defeat the Book of Mormon, or the believers and apologists that support it. I was a Mormon." - Tom Donofrio | https://wasmormon.org/profile/thomasdonofrio/
"To remain in the church I had to choose one of the following three options. 1) Reject the science, 2) Completely change how I interpreted the Book of Mormon by accepting revisionist apologetic scholarship and at the same time reject countless prophetic statements concerning the Book of Mormon or, 3) Keep my doubts to myself and stop thinking. None of these alternatives was palatable to me." - Simon Southerton https://wasmormon.org/profile/simon-southerton/
"To remain in the church I had to choose one of the following three options. 1) Reject the science, 2) Completely change how I interpreted the Book of Mormon by accepting revisionist apologetic scholarship and at the same time reject countless prophetic statements concerning the Book of Mormon or, 3) Keep my doubts to myself and stop thinking. None of these alternatives was palatable to me." - Simon Southerton https://wasmormon.org/profile/simon-southerton/