Tag Archives: I Was a Mormon

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"For every falsehood a person embraces, that person is crippled in proportion to the depth and breadth of the falsehood he embraces. Mormonism has enormous dimensions, and discarding this falsehood has been like adding a supercharger to my life engine. My discernment is sharpened, my energy and motivation are heightened, my human biases are more easily squelched, my mind is open to new ideas, I have shed prejudices and truly feel all humans are created equal, my friendships are more genuine, the world is more beautiful, there is more joy in giving, there is more authentic meaning in living." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"For every falsehood a person embraces, that person is crippled in proportion to the depth and breadth of the falsehood he embraces. Mormonism has enormous dimensions, and discarding this falsehood has been like adding a supercharger to my life engine. My discernment is sharpened, my energy and motivation are heightened, my human biases are more easily squelched, my mind is open to new ideas, I have shed prejudices and truly feel all humans are created equal, my friendships are more genuine, the world is more beautiful, there is more joy in giving, there is more authentic meaning in living." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"As I studied the realities associated with the so-called ‘restoration’, unfiltered and un-whitewashed for the first time, ... It became blatantly evident, as I stepped back and considered the whole picture, that the God defined by Mormonism was not an entity worthy of my worship, worthy of emulation, or even an entity with whom I would want to associate at any level." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"As I studied the realities associated with the so-called ‘restoration’, unfiltered and un-whitewashed for the first time, ... It became blatantly evident, as I stepped back and considered the whole picture, that the God defined by Mormonism was not an entity worthy of my worship, worthy of emulation, or even an entity with whom I would want to associate at any level." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"I buried these troubling concerns deep inside and tried to keep them suppressed. For some, this can work for a lifetime, but ultimately it did not work for me. These issues and others (polygamy, dark skin curse doctrine, etc.) eventually began to surface and I became increasingly uncomfortable with my core beliefs. The desire to know the truth at whatever cost finally outweighed the desire and need to believe and belong." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"I buried these troubling concerns deep inside and tried to keep them suppressed. For some, this can work for a lifetime, but ultimately it did not work for me. These issues and others (polygamy, dark skin curse doctrine, etc.) eventually began to surface and I became increasingly uncomfortable with my core beliefs. The desire to know the truth at whatever cost finally outweighed the desire and need to believe and belong." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"Another major issue for me was the Mark Hofmann affair. Here was a guy that had easily duped the Lord’s anointed, which was not a big deal, but the part that was very disconcerting was that the documents bought by high-ranking church authorities were being purchased primarily to keep them hidden. Why would they need to do that? Surely the true church has nothing to hide. This made no sense. Something was definitely amiss here; I could feel it in my gut." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"Another major issue for me was the Mark Hofmann affair. Here was a guy that had easily duped the Lord’s anointed, which was not a big deal, but the part that was very disconcerting was that the documents bought by high-ranking church authorities were being purchased primarily to keep them hidden. Why would they need to do that? Surely the true church has nothing to hide. This made no sense. Something was definitely amiss here; I could feel it in my gut." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"Many things had troubled me about Mormonism over the years. The first one was the central concept of the infinite and eternal atonement. Christ didn’t just suffer for the sins of the inhabitants of the earth, he suffered for everyone everywhere, in every world throughout the galaxy – the atonement was both infinite and eternal. So, people in other worlds like our earth, would have different scriptures describing an extra-terrestrial named Jesus, who would suffer for the sins of the people, but would never live on their own world... There comes a time for every individual when the story becomes, like the proverbial fisherman’s tale - too tall. I had reached my limit." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"Many things had troubled me about Mormonism over the years. The first one was the central concept of the infinite and eternal atonement. Christ didn’t just suffer for the sins of the inhabitants of the earth, he suffered for everyone everywhere, in every world throughout the galaxy – the atonement was both infinite and eternal. So, people in other worlds like our earth, would have different scriptures describing an extra-terrestrial named Jesus, who would suffer for the sins of the people, but would never live on their own world... There comes a time for every individual when the story becomes, like the proverbial fisherman’s tale - too tall. I had reached my limit." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"I am a ‘born in the covenant’ fourth generation pioneer heritage Mormon, with polygamists on both sides of the family tree. Many ward members were guessing that I would be the next Bishop when in fact I was becoming increasingly uncomfortable attending church each Sunday. I was finding that Sunday was rapidly becoming the most dishonest day of my week. I was a Mormon." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/
"I am a ‘born in the covenant’ fourth generation pioneer heritage Mormon, with polygamists on both sides of the family tree. Many ward members were guessing that I would be the next Bishop when in fact I was becoming increasingly uncomfortable attending church each Sunday. I was finding that Sunday was rapidly becoming the most dishonest day of my week. I was a Mormon." - Lyndon Lamborn | https://wasmormon.org/profile/lyndonlamborn/

Byron Marchant, Accused Dissident, Unjustifiably Excommunicated for Opposing Priesthood Ban in 1977

Among the first votes of dissent in the modern Mormon church occurred in 1977, in opposition to the church doctrine banning blacks from any priesthood ordination and temple endowment. A member voted opposed to sustaining church leadership in General Conference 1977 and was subsequently excommunicated. Then less than 1 year later the church downgraded the …

Continue reading “Byron Marchant, Accused Dissident, Unjustifiably Excommunicated for Opposing Priesthood Ban in 1977”

"The Adam-God problem continued to occupy my mind. I finally decided to try to settle the matter. If the doctrine were true, I was willing, as a faithful member of the church, to accept it. If it were not true, I needed some explanation about the apparent fact that Brigham Young (and other church authorities of his time) vigorously taught it. So I composed a letter to Joseph Fielding Smith, whom I respected very much, and who at the time was the Church Historian and the president of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. I spelled out to President Smith my dilemma: the evidence seemed to be clear and uncontroverted that Brigham Young had taught that Adam is God the Father. But the present church does not teach this. What is the truth? I secretly thought that President Smith would write back and say something like: "Yes, you can be assured that President Young taught the truth: Adam is our Father and our God. The church does not proclaim this precious truth because we do not wish to expose the mysteries of God to the mockery of the world. Preserve this secret truth as you do the secrets of your temple endowment." I received a short and clear answer to my letter from President Smith. It was quite different from what I had expected. He wrote that such an idea was unscriptural and untrue, and completely false. He did not deal with the evidence that Brigham Young had taught it. He ignored the whole problem as if it didn't exist. It bothered me, but I tried to put it out of my mind." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"The Adam-God problem continued to occupy my mind. I finally decided to try to settle the matter. If the doctrine were true, I was willing, as a faithful member of the church, to accept it. If it were not true, I needed some explanation about the apparent fact that Brigham Young (and other church authorities of his time) vigorously taught it. So I composed a letter to Joseph Fielding Smith, whom I respected very much, and who at the time was the Church Historian and the president of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. I spelled out to President Smith my dilemma: the evidence seemed to be clear and uncontroverted that Brigham Young had taught that Adam is God the Father. But the present church does not teach this. What is the truth? I secretly thought that President Smith would write back and say something like: "Yes, you can be assured that President Young taught the truth: Adam is our Father and our God. The church does not proclaim this precious truth because we do not wish to expose the mysteries of God to the mockery of the world. Preserve this secret truth as you do the secrets of your temple endowment." I received a short and clear answer to my letter from President Smith. It was quite different from what I had expected. He wrote that such an idea was unscriptural and untrue, and completely false. He did not deal with the evidence that Brigham Young had taught it. He ignored the whole problem as if it didn't exist. It bothered me, but I tried to put it out of my mind." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"Subsequent study has given me a hundred times as much damning information about the church and its history as I had at the time of my original decision to leave it. Many Mormon friends and family members have tried to convince me that I made a mistake, but when I insist that they also listen to what I have to say about my reasons for believing the church to be false, they soon abandon the attempt, even though I assure them that my mind is open to any evidence or reasoning I may have overlooked." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"Subsequent study has given me a hundred times as much damning information about the church and its history as I had at the time of my original decision to leave it. Many Mormon friends and family members have tried to convince me that I made a mistake, but when I insist that they also listen to what I have to say about my reasons for believing the church to be false, they soon abandon the attempt, even though I assure them that my mind is open to any evidence or reasoning I may have overlooked." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I am descended from a long line of faithful Mormons. All of my ancestors in every branch of my family, for four, five and six generations, were Mormons. The Mormons and their history are my heritage. It is my only heritage. It is where I come from. I left the Mormon church in 1958, when I was 25 years old. I was a Mormon." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I am descended from a long line of faithful Mormons. All of my ancestors in every branch of my family, for four, five and six generations, were Mormons. The Mormons and their history are my heritage. It is my only heritage. It is where I come from. I left the Mormon church in 1958, when I was 25 years old. I was a Mormon." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I remained a faithful member of the church, fulfilling all my church obligations, attending meetings, observing the Word of Wisdom, wearing my temple garments. But I was struggling mightily to reconcile the church's inconsistencies, lies, and dubious past with my faith in its divinity. It was at a single moment one day in the university library when I was pondering this problem. I was suddenly struck with the thought, "All of these problems disappear as soon as you realize that the Mormon church is just another man-made institution. Everything then is easily explained." It was like a revelation. The weight suddenly lifted from me and I was filled with a feeling of joy and exhilaration. Of course! Why hadn't I seen it before?" - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I remained a faithful member of the church, fulfilling all my church obligations, attending meetings, observing the Word of Wisdom, wearing my temple garments. But I was struggling mightily to reconcile the church's inconsistencies, lies, and dubious past with my faith in its divinity. It was at a single moment one day in the university library when I was pondering this problem. I was suddenly struck with the thought, "All of these problems disappear as soon as you realize that the Mormon church is just another man-made institution. Everything then is easily explained." It was like a revelation. The weight suddenly lifted from me and I was filled with a feeling of joy and exhilaration. Of course! Why hadn't I seen it before?" - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"My childhood was very happy, with loving and nurturing parents and family. We were "special" because we had the "Gospel," meaning Mormonism. My high school sweetheart was a good and faithful Mormon girl. I enjoyed my four years at BYU, being surrounded by devout fellow-students and being taught by devout and educated teachers. One professor of geology was also a member of our ward. I was just learning about the age of the earth as most geologists taught it. I asked him one Sunday at church how he reconciled the teachings of his science with the teachings of the church (which said that the earth was created about 6000 years ago). He replied that he had two compartments in his brain: one for geology and one for the gospel. They were entirely separate, and he did not let the one influence the other. This bothered me, but I didn't think more about it." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"My childhood was very happy, with loving and nurturing parents and family. We were "special" because we had the "Gospel," meaning Mormonism. My high school sweetheart was a good and faithful Mormon girl. I enjoyed my four years at BYU, being surrounded by devout fellow-students and being taught by devout and educated teachers. One professor of geology was also a member of our ward. I was just learning about the age of the earth as most geologists taught it. I asked him one Sunday at church how he reconciled the teachings of his science with the teachings of the church (which said that the earth was created about 6000 years ago). He replied that he had two compartments in his brain: one for geology and one for the gospel. They were entirely separate, and he did not let the one influence the other. This bothered me, but I didn't think more about it." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I left for one reason, and one reason only: the Mormon church is not led by God, and it never has been. It is a religion of 100% human origin. However, my life since leaving the church has been a rich and rewarding one. I married a lovely girl with beliefs similar to mine, and we now have two fine adult sons whom we raised with no religious training whatsoever, and who are as admirable human beings as one could ever want their children to be. And as I am getting older I also realize that I have no fear of death, even though I have no idea what to expect when it comes." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I left for one reason, and one reason only: the Mormon church is not led by God, and it never has been. It is a religion of 100% human origin. However, my life since leaving the church has been a rich and rewarding one. I married a lovely girl with beliefs similar to mine, and we now have two fine adult sons whom we raised with no religious training whatsoever, and who are as admirable human beings as one could ever want their children to be. And as I am getting older I also realize that I have no fear of death, even though I have no idea what to expect when it comes." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I realized that in order for me to defend Mormonism I would have to know what its enemies were saying about it, so that I could be prepared with the proper facts. I had never been an avid student of the history of the church, although I had earned the highest grades in the third year high-school seminary course in church history. I mean, what was there important to know about church history, beyond the story of how Joseph had his visions, got the plates, translated them, and how Satan had persecuted the Saints until they got to Utah? I began to read church history, both the authentic histories published by the church and the awful lies and distortions published by its enemies. How different they were! It was almost as if the authors in each camp were writing about different events. And the university library, where I spent a good deal of time, seemed to have more of the latter than the former.What began to bother me most was that the church did not seem to be telling the entire truth about many events in its past." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I realized that in order for me to defend Mormonism I would have to know what its enemies were saying about it, so that I could be prepared with the proper facts. I had never been an avid student of the history of the church, although I had earned the highest grades in the third year high-school seminary course in church history. I mean, what was there important to know about church history, beyond the story of how Joseph had his visions, got the plates, translated them, and how Satan had persecuted the Saints until they got to Utah? I began to read church history, both the authentic histories published by the church and the awful lies and distortions published by its enemies. How different they were! It was almost as if the authors in each camp were writing about different events. And the university library, where I spent a good deal of time, seemed to have more of the latter than the former.What began to bother me most was that the church did not seem to be telling the entire truth about many events in its past." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I rushed home to share with my wife the great discovery I had made. I told her what I had learned: the church isn't true! She turned away and refused to accept anything I said critical about the church. It was the beginning of the end of our marriage. A last-ditch attempt at reconciliation failed when she said that her return would be conditioned upon my returning to the faith. I realized that I could not do it, however much I wanted to keep my family. In the years since leaving the church I have never regretted my decision for a moment (other than the fact that it caused me to lose my wife and children)." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I rushed home to share with my wife the great discovery I had made. I told her what I had learned: the church isn't true! She turned away and refused to accept anything I said critical about the church. It was the beginning of the end of our marriage. A last-ditch attempt at reconciliation failed when she said that her return would be conditioned upon my returning to the faith. I realized that I could not do it, however much I wanted to keep my family. In the years since leaving the church I have never regretted my decision for a moment (other than the fact that it caused me to lose my wife and children)." - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I was offered a scholarship at Northwestern University to work on a master's degree. So my young wife and I with our two (at that time) babies moved to Evanston, Illinois, and for the first time in my life I was surrounded by non-Mormons. I was the only Mormon in my university program. This did not intimidate me in the least. I felt that I was intelligent enough, knowledgeable enough about religion, and skillful enough in debating skills to discuss, defend and promote my religion with anybody. I soon found takers. Many of my fellow graduate students had questions about Mormonism. They were friendly questions, but challenging. For the first time in my life I had the opportunity to spread the gospel. It was exhilarating. We had some wonderful discussions. They asked me questions that I was unable to answer satisfactorily because they were based on facts I was unfamiliar with. I had never heard about the Danite enforcer gangs, about the Blood Atonement Doctrine or the Adam-God Doctrine. Where did these horrible allegations come from?" - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
"I was offered a scholarship at Northwestern University to work on a master's degree. So my young wife and I with our two (at that time) babies moved to Evanston, Illinois, and for the first time in my life I was surrounded by non-Mormons. I was the only Mormon in my university program. This did not intimidate me in the least. I felt that I was intelligent enough, knowledgeable enough about religion, and skillful enough in debating skills to discuss, defend and promote my religion with anybody. I soon found takers. Many of my fellow graduate students had questions about Mormonism. They were friendly questions, but challenging. For the first time in my life I had the opportunity to spread the gospel. It was exhilarating. We had some wonderful discussions. They asked me questions that I was unable to answer satisfactorily because they were based on facts I was unfamiliar with. I had never heard about the Danite enforcer gangs, about the Blood Atonement Doctrine or the Adam-God Doctrine. Where did these horrible allegations come from?" - Richard Packham | https://wasmormon.org/profile/richard-packham/
All my children have left the church, each for their own reasons, and my husband eventually left as well. We are all so happy and content with our life now. Finding a Community has been tough but I wouldn’t change anything. The people in our lives now are genuine, kind and real. There is life after mormonism, and it's wonderful. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
All my children have left the church, each for their own reasons, and my husband eventually left as well. We are all so happy and content with our life now. Finding a Community has been tough but I wouldn’t change anything. The people in our lives now are genuine, kind and real. There is life after mormonism, and it's wonderful. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
Like a lot of people, my final Sunday at church was the last Sunday before Covid. I started listening to podcasts and came across one about a lady who had left the Mormon church. Everything she said resonated with me so strongly and I wanted to learn more. I listened to everything I could find, Mormon Stories, etc. I knew I was completely done and was never going back. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
Like a lot of people, my final Sunday at church was the last Sunday before Covid. I started listening to podcasts and came across one about a lady who had left the Mormon church. Everything she said resonated with me so strongly and I wanted to learn more. I listened to everything I could find, Mormon Stories, etc. I knew I was completely done and was never going back. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
I eventually went back to church because I still had little ones at home and thought it was the only way. My shelf was so full of teachings I didn’t understand and things I no longer believed in. They put me in Relief Society for five years but I would only teach lessons on god's love and faith and enduring to the end. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
I eventually went back to church because I still had little ones at home and thought it was the only way. My shelf was so full of teachings I didn’t understand and things I no longer believed in. They put me in Relief Society for five years but I would only teach lessons on god's love and faith and enduring to the end. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
I had my first faith crisis when our oldest started giving us trouble in high school. I realized then, that my eternal family may not be so eternal. I also realized I believed in a very scary and judgmental God and I didn’t like it.  I went inactive for about a year. I started studying other books about God, his love, his mercy. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
I had my first faith crisis when our oldest started giving us trouble in high school. I realized then, that my eternal family may not be so eternal. I also realized I believed in a very scary and judgmental God and I didn’t like it.  I went inactive for about a year. I started studying other books about God, his love, his mercy. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
When I was 12, two Mormon missionaries showed up at our door. My mom, sister and I were baptized shortly after. I was semi-active during the next six years but ended up going to Rick's college where I met my husband. Two years later, we both went on missions. Four month after we returned we were married in the Oakland temple. My desire was always to give my future children a different life than I had. I fully embraced the gospel during and after my mission and loved it. We raised four children in the church, served in many callings and was all in. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/
When I was 12, two Mormon missionaries showed up at our door. My mom, sister and I were baptized shortly after. I was semi-active during the next six years but ended up going to Rick's college where I met my husband. Two years later, we both went on missions. Four month after we returned we were married in the Oakland temple. My desire was always to give my future children a different life than I had. I fully embraced the gospel during and after my mission and loved it. We raised four children in the church, served in many callings and was all in. | https://wasmormon.org/profile/beth/