Latter-day Saint apologetics—through institutions like FARMS, FAIR, and now the Interpreter Foundation—have largely operated on a defensive crouch, crafting arguments not to generate genuine conviction, but simply to keep belief from crumbling. Their aim isn’t to persuade the outsider or satisfy the seeker; it’s to keep the disillusioned member tethered, just barely. But Farrer warns …
Tag Archives: Psychology
How to Let Religion Sabotage Your Life: A Deconstructing Mormon Perspective on Jim Palmer’s 16 Steps
Jim Palmer, a former pastor turned spiritual critic and trauma-informed coach, outlines 16 stark observations in his piece How to Let Religion Sabotage Your Life. For those deconstructing Mormonism, these steps feel less like satire and more like a checklist of lived experience: 1. Begin with the premise that there is something hopelessly and incurably …
The Stages of Grief When Your Shelf Breaks
Losing one’s testimony is a deeply painful experience, tragically affecting both the individual and the community. Faithful members mourn the loss of a fellow believer, viewing it as a defeat or a sign of weakness—someone who will now be cast aside like chaff from the wheat. But the greatest hardship falls on the individual. They …
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Fast Food Orders vs Quitting Church – McDonald’s, Messed-Up Orders, and the Commoditization of Religion
A popular meme has been making the rounds. These memes read: “McDonald’s can mess up your order 101 times and you still keep going back… One thing goes wrong at church and you quit.” This suggests that people are more forgiving of mistakes at fast-food restaurants like McDonald’s than they are of issues with a church. It …
Life Beyond Mormonism: 10 Books and Resources That Might Help
Stepping away from a faith tradition—especially one that touches every aspect of life like Mormonism—can be both liberating and disorienting. If you’re navigating this path, you’re not alone. Many individuals have documented their experiences, researched the history, and formed supportive communities. Below are books and resources that countless people have found helpful in understanding Mormonism’s …
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Tom Was a Mormon, an Ex-Mormon Profile Spotlight
Tom’s journey out of the LDS Church is shaped by a lifetime of devotion and careful reflection. Raised as a descendent of early Mormon pioneers, he grew up deeply rooted in the faith, participating in every aspect from Seminary and a mission to a temple marriage, and later serving in leadership roles within the church. …
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Truth and More – Merciful Companion to Truth is Silence?
Russell M. Nelson, in his youthful apostolic messages, taught that truth was important, but must be paired with mercy and more. He warns that simply knowing the truth does not excuse us from thoughtfully considering its use and power. He relates a story of a surgeon who spoke the truth bluntly and ended up hurting …
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What is Cognitive Dissonance?
Cognitive dissonance occurs when a person experiences discomfort due to holding conflicting beliefs, attitudes, or behaviors. To reduce this discomfort, individuals often try to reconcile these inconsistencies, either by changing their beliefs, justifying their actions, or avoiding information that exacerbates the conflict. Leon Festinger Social psychologist Leon Festinger coined the term “cognitive dissonance” in the 1950s in …
Mormonism and The BITE Model
Determining whether The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (commonly known as the Mormon Church) qualifies as a cult hinges on various criteria. According to the BITE model, we find evidence that it meets several characteristics associated with cults. Note that the term “cult” carries negative connotations and lacks a universally agreed-upon definition, and …
The BITE Model to Cults from Dr Steven Hassan
Steven Hassan Dr. Steven Hassan is a prominent mental health professional, author, and advocate known for his expertise in cults and undue influence. Having experienced firsthand the effects of mind control and manipulation as a former member of the Unification Church (commonly known as the Moonies), Dr. Hassan has dedicated his life to helping individuals …
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Elevation and Other Elevated Emotions
Many people who have left the church report still feeling the “spirit” just as they did when they were active members. This feeling is linked to a phenomenon called “Elevation Emotion,” which is well-researched and associated with positive emotions like gratitude and admiration. Researchers can reliably induce this feeling, often described as a warm sensation …
Confirmation Bias
Confirmation bias refers to the cognitive tendency of individuals to interpret or seek out information in a way that confirms their preexisting beliefs or hypotheses. When someone experiences confirmation bias, they are more likely to notice, remember, and give greater weight to information that supports their existing beliefs, while disregarding or downplaying evidence that contradicts …
Moroni’s Promise – A Lesson in Confirmation Bias and Elevated Emotions
In the Book of Mormon, Moroni offers a promise often cited by members of the LDS Church to confirm its truthfulness. This promise is foundational for many Mormons, providing a personal spiritual confirmation of the church’s teachings. Moroni encourages readers to ask God with a sincere heart and real intent if the Book of Mormon …
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Jim Was a Mormon, an Ex-Mormon Profile Spotlight
Jim’s upbringing in a remote Idaho town was deeply tied to the Mormon faith, where he committed himself to its principles from a young age. However, after decades of unwavering dedication and significant leadership roles within the Church, Jim found himself at a crossroads. A mid-life crisis prompted a profound reassessment of his beliefs, fueled …
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Veronika Was a Mormon, an Ex-Mormon Profile Spotlight
Veronika’s faith journey from a Mormon to an agnostic secular humanist shows personal evolution and intellectual transformation. Growing up in Utah, she was the first in her immediate family to step away from the LDS Church. Initially embracing the conviction that living the gospel would lead to a happy life, Veronika grappled with the church’s …
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Dealing with Doubts and Controversial Opinions
How does the church instruct the members to deal with their doubts? First, we do have an admission that we have legitimate reason to doubt. But First Doubt Your Doubts Even if there are legitimate things that may cause us to doubt, doubt these legitimate reasons before giving into any actual doubting. It’s natural to …
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Writing Your Traumatic Faith Crisis Experience is Healthy and Healing
Do you have exmormon trauma? Try writing your story. Write about your faith deconstruction or crisis. wasmormon.org gives you a place to do this important and healing writing. Consider contributing your story to the site so others can read it and find community and validation as well! Suppressing the trauma is bad for us and …
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Personal Mormon Faith Crisis Report – Introduction and Overview
The Personal Faith Crisis Report was presented to Elder Uchtdorf in 2013 by Elder Jensen so leaders could better understand what is happening and take appropriate measures to address members leaving the church as a result of a faith crisis. The gospel topic essays were part of the response to this study by the church.
Finding Personal Meaning and Purpose in a Faith Transition
In a faith transition many face feelings of groundlessness akin to crisis level vertigo. They may feel that their life is completely falling apart; that nothing is what it seemed and they struggle to cope with such a huge shift. They face reprocessing every principle, every value and potentially every reason for every thing in …
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Dumbo’s Feather
In the story of Dumbo, we have the little elephant with giant ears (even for an elephant) born into a circus family. His ears are so big that while his name is Jumbo, he earns the nickname Dumbo. His mother is soon imprisoned for standing up for him when he is ridiculed. Maybe she overreacts …