Tag Archives: I Was a Mormon

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“One evening when I was at the factory entrance punching the time clock beginning my 2nd shift work, I encountered Brother P. as he was leaving the building and engaged me in conversation. He asked, "Mike, are you going to go on a Mission?" I said, "No, I am not. I am making preparations to go to University in the Fall, study Aerospace Engineering, enter the Air Force through ROTC and go on to fly jets." Brother P. replied, with a mix of disgust and disappointment, "Well, that's too bad!"” - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
“One evening when I was at the factory entrance punching the time clock beginning my 2nd shift work, I encountered Brother P. as he was leaving the building and engaged me in conversation. He asked, "Mike, are you going to go on a Mission?" I said, "No, I am not. I am making preparations to go to University in the Fall, study Aerospace Engineering, enter the Air Force through ROTC and go on to fly jets." Brother P. replied, with a mix of disgust and disappointment, "Well, that's too bad!"” - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
"In my youth, before I physically left, I did not develop the personal sovereignty, nor the courage, nor even the idea, to say to my Mormon parent, "I don't believe in this, therefor, I am no longer going to pretend by doing the things I am 'supposed' to do there." Approaching that important male age of 19, I had other plans, going on a Mission did not align with the sense of truth and integrity that I had begun to develop. There was no way that I would participate in preparing for and then inflicting the Mormon sales pitch on fellow human beings. To do so would have been trying to sell them on a view of the universe that I did not believe." - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
"In my youth, before I physically left, I did not develop the personal sovereignty, nor the courage, nor even the idea, to say to my Mormon parent, "I don't believe in this, therefor, I am no longer going to pretend by doing the things I am 'supposed' to do there." Approaching that important male age of 19, I had other plans, going on a Mission did not align with the sense of truth and integrity that I had begun to develop. There was no way that I would participate in preparing for and then inflicting the Mormon sales pitch on fellow human beings. To do so would have been trying to sell them on a view of the universe that I did not believe." - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
"I left Mormonism at age 19. One might think that my exposure to the cult was therefore very limited, and, yes I am fortunate to have left when I did. However, I left still bearing many scars, wounds, confusions and emotional difficulties that were mostly hidden and not recognized nor understood by me. These things I sorted out over several phases of healing and genuine spiritual discovery throughout life, but not without trouble and tragedy in the interim. My family dynamics certainly contributed to those dysfunctions, but Mormonism acted to cement those dysfunctions and also prevented or greatly impeded other potential moderating or positive mentoring influences that would have otherwise been available from outside my family situation." - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
"I left Mormonism at age 19. One might think that my exposure to the cult was therefore very limited, and, yes I am fortunate to have left when I did. However, I left still bearing many scars, wounds, confusions and emotional difficulties that were mostly hidden and not recognized nor understood by me. These things I sorted out over several phases of healing and genuine spiritual discovery throughout life, but not without trouble and tragedy in the interim. My family dynamics certainly contributed to those dysfunctions, but Mormonism acted to cement those dysfunctions and also prevented or greatly impeded other potential moderating or positive mentoring influences that would have otherwise been available from outside my family situation." - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
“My father was not a member, not a participant, not interested, generally did not openly express an opinion about how my mother was raising us "in the church," but on occasion said "do what your mother tells you." Per my mother's edict, our attendance and participation was a fundamental requirement of our existence. At "church" to my supposed peers, I was the quiet, skinny little kid who either didn't have a father, or even worse, whose father "wasn't a member!"” - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
“My father was not a member, not a participant, not interested, generally did not openly express an opinion about how my mother was raising us "in the church," but on occasion said "do what your mother tells you." Per my mother's edict, our attendance and participation was a fundamental requirement of our existence. At "church" to my supposed peers, I was the quiet, skinny little kid who either didn't have a father, or even worse, whose father "wasn't a member!"” - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
"I am a husband, father, teacher, reader, questioner, thinker, traveler and I am living my best life. I was raised in a half-mormon household. This somewhat unique circumstance exacerbated the negative effects of Mormonism upon my psyche, yet may have allowed for an easier departure when that event occurred. I was a Mormon." - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
"I am a husband, father, teacher, reader, questioner, thinker, traveler and I am living my best life. I was raised in a half-mormon household. This somewhat unique circumstance exacerbated the negative effects of Mormonism upon my psyche, yet may have allowed for an easier departure when that event occurred. I was a Mormon." - Mike | https://wasmormon.org/profile/deserveliberty/
"I knew from the beginning that I would walk with a spiritual limp the rest of my life, the price I paid for being there, and believing. From this I have learned a truth about Mormonism: The power of its sociology – its cultures, its traditions, its people – is of such intensity and persistent power for those who love it, that doctrine and history can pale in significance unless truth is more important than any other thing. Truth is worth any limp, any price." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I knew from the beginning that I would walk with a spiritual limp the rest of my life, the price I paid for being there, and believing. From this I have learned a truth about Mormonism: The power of its sociology – its cultures, its traditions, its people – is of such intensity and persistent power for those who love it, that doctrine and history can pale in significance unless truth is more important than any other thing. Truth is worth any limp, any price." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"Who do you blame when you have been duped by a church? I couldn’t blame myself, though the responsibility surely lay there. I wanted to reproach myself for being suckered – but how could I hold responsible the trusting teenager? The trusting college student? If there is no loss as great as the loss of one’s god, there are few tasks to compare with setting out to learn to serve another One. If you’ve been burned by a god, how do you learn to trust another one? Make no mistake about it, I knew I needed what only He could provide: forgiveness of sins, eternal life, church and community based on truth, not beloved fictions." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"Who do you blame when you have been duped by a church? I couldn’t blame myself, though the responsibility surely lay there. I wanted to reproach myself for being suckered – but how could I hold responsible the trusting teenager? The trusting college student? If there is no loss as great as the loss of one’s god, there are few tasks to compare with setting out to learn to serve another One. If you’ve been burned by a god, how do you learn to trust another one? Make no mistake about it, I knew I needed what only He could provide: forgiveness of sins, eternal life, church and community based on truth, not beloved fictions." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I didn’t want to believe that my own local LDS leadership could be deceptive until I asked to be excommunicated from the LDS Church several months before The Mormon Mirage was to be published. Unbeknownst to me, a Mormon who was a self-appointed mole in ex-Mormon organizations was corresponding with me under the pretext that he had left the Church too and apparently had been reporting my research to Church leaders. The unarticulated and un-targeted sense of betrayal I felt became the permanent inner garment of my soul." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I didn’t want to believe that my own local LDS leadership could be deceptive until I asked to be excommunicated from the LDS Church several months before The Mormon Mirage was to be published. Unbeknownst to me, a Mormon who was a self-appointed mole in ex-Mormon organizations was corresponding with me under the pretext that he had left the Church too and apparently had been reporting my research to Church leaders. The unarticulated and un-targeted sense of betrayal I felt became the permanent inner garment of my soul." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"But still I wanted to believe the best about Mormons themselves and was genuinely, continuously surprised by their actions as well. I didn’t want to believe that people would lie about an apostate who left for doctrinal reasons, until another woman who left the Church learned that it had been announced in Relief Society meeting that she - who had always been faithful to her husband - was excommunicated for adultery." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"But still I wanted to believe the best about Mormons themselves and was genuinely, continuously surprised by their actions as well. I didn’t want to believe that people would lie about an apostate who left for doctrinal reasons, until another woman who left the Church learned that it had been announced in Relief Society meeting that she - who had always been faithful to her husband - was excommunicated for adultery." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I was startled over and over by the contrast between what I’d been taught in my BYU classes and what Mormon history really was like—the deceptions of Joseph Smith, the failed prophecies, the ignoble shams. The Book of Mormon continued to crumble before my eyes, unredeemed even by its quaintness and platitudes. The Book of Abraham was an embarrassing fraud. Different god, different heaven, different eternal past. Again and again the glaring difference between Bible doctrine and LDS doctrine disquieted me as if I’d never seen it before." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I was startled over and over by the contrast between what I’d been taught in my BYU classes and what Mormon history really was like—the deceptions of Joseph Smith, the failed prophecies, the ignoble shams. The Book of Mormon continued to crumble before my eyes, unredeemed even by its quaintness and platitudes. The Book of Abraham was an embarrassing fraud. Different god, different heaven, different eternal past. Again and again the glaring difference between Bible doctrine and LDS doctrine disquieted me as if I’d never seen it before." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"That’s where the true leap of faith was – to believe the Bible was the inviolate communication of this good, relationship-seeking, Creator God. I couldn’t trust anyone or anything else on earth but that Book. But sometimes it was almost too painful to read, and I shrank from His touch. I began “The Mormon Mirage” to explain to myself as much as to anyone why I had made the decision to abandon the single most satisfying and soul-healing thing in my life." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"That’s where the true leap of faith was – to believe the Bible was the inviolate communication of this good, relationship-seeking, Creator God. I couldn’t trust anyone or anything else on earth but that Book. But sometimes it was almost too painful to read, and I shrank from His touch. I began “The Mormon Mirage” to explain to myself as much as to anyone why I had made the decision to abandon the single most satisfying and soul-healing thing in my life." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I looked around me at the beauty and diversity of nature, and concluded that such order and creativity indicated the existence of a Creator. Whoever made all that was both complicated and good. If He created all of nature, and I was part of nature, He had created me. If He created me and all mankind, I concluded that surely He would want to communicate with us. Since I had seen the danger of unfettered "personal revelation," I supposed that there would have to be a type of communication that would be beyond human contrivances, something truly reliable." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I looked around me at the beauty and diversity of nature, and concluded that such order and creativity indicated the existence of a Creator. Whoever made all that was both complicated and good. If He created all of nature, and I was part of nature, He had created me. If He created me and all mankind, I concluded that surely He would want to communicate with us. Since I had seen the danger of unfettered "personal revelation," I supposed that there would have to be a type of communication that would be beyond human contrivances, something truly reliable." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"The next fall I went away to BYU, where I was gloriously happy. I studied, believed and lived Mormonism as it wanted to be understood. I honored the prophet and my leaders as personal heroes. I worked hard, putting myself through school without any outside help other than writing scholarships and earned good grades and loved, just loved, being a Mormon. I participated in every ward function and continued to write and be published in BYU’s publications and to read voraciously." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"The next fall I went away to BYU, where I was gloriously happy. I studied, believed and lived Mormonism as it wanted to be understood. I honored the prophet and my leaders as personal heroes. I worked hard, putting myself through school without any outside help other than writing scholarships and earned good grades and loved, just loved, being a Mormon. I participated in every ward function and continued to write and be published in BYU’s publications and to read voraciously." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I was a convert to the church. I wanted to please God, and I believed that I could do that in Mormonism. No ulterior motives, no grand plan, just simplicity and the literal faith of a child. I had a great respect for Scripture and a love for my Creator, and Mormonism gave me the chance to expand and act on that love while learning more about God and His mysteries than I’d ever dreamed. I was a mormon." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/
"I was a convert to the church. I wanted to please God, and I believed that I could do that in Mormonism. No ulterior motives, no grand plan, just simplicity and the literal faith of a child. I had a great respect for Scripture and a love for my Creator, and Mormonism gave me the chance to expand and act on that love while learning more about God and His mysteries than I’d ever dreamed. I was a mormon." - Latayne Scott | https://wasmormon.org/profile/latayne-scott/

Men Of Their Times

Church leaders assert that they directly follow God’s guidance, exempting themselves from apologies and social pressure, like for example addressing racism within church doctrine and culture. Apologists claim that church leaders are merely “men of their times” and can’t be judged by today’s standards. These two ideas don’t work together. Either the leaders are led …

Continue reading “Men Of Their Times”

"When I left, I still more or less “believed”, I just simply didn’t want what was taught. After I left, I gave myself permission to view materials not solely on the church website and have since come to the conclusion that I don’t believe the truth claims of the LDS church. My husband left at the same time as me about 3 years ago, and we’re now trying to survive our 2-year-olds reign of terror." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org
"When I left, I still more or less “believed”, I just simply didn’t want what was taught. After I left, I gave myself permission to view materials not solely on the church website and have since come to the conclusion that I don’t believe the truth claims of the LDS church. My husband left at the same time as me about 3 years ago, and we’re now trying to survive our 2-year-olds reign of terror." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org
"It all came to a crossroads when I volunteered to teach a CTR 4 class, and while reading the lesson beforehand I realized I didn’t agree with it. I decided if I can’t agree with a CTR 4 lesson, then this wasn’t what I wanted to raise my future family in." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org
"It all came to a crossroads when I volunteered to teach a CTR 4 class, and while reading the lesson beforehand I realized I didn’t agree with it. I decided if I can’t agree with a CTR 4 lesson, then this wasn’t what I wanted to raise my future family in." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org
"As I did my research, I stumbled upon the Gospel Topic Essays and this was when I first learned the extent of Joseph Smith’s polygamy. I brought this up to my mom, and she accused me of trying to get her to read anti-Mormon literature. She didn’t believe that the Gospel Topics Essay I showed her was on the church website were real and questioned how the authors of the essay could know Joseph Smith had more than one wife. I read all the apologist websites and studied scripture and the church website, but the explanations provided were not enough for me." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org
"As I did my research, I stumbled upon the Gospel Topic Essays and this was when I first learned the extent of Joseph Smith’s polygamy. I brought this up to my mom, and she accused me of trying to get her to read anti-Mormon literature. She didn’t believe that the Gospel Topics Essay I showed her was on the church website were real and questioned how the authors of the essay could know Joseph Smith had more than one wife. I read all the apologist websites and studied scripture and the church website, but the explanations provided were not enough for me." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org
"My [new] husband and I started considering starting a family, and I knew that I wanted to have a career. I started researching old conference talks, ensign articles, etc to see what the overall consensus was on women working outside the home, and it was obvious to me that while there was discussion of each woman can choose what's best for herself, the overwhelming expectation was to stay home and not work outside the home. I could only find a few quotes that even suggested it might be okay to work and be a mom. This was so hard for me because I knew that I wanted a career and aspirations outside the home, yet that didn’t seem to be the “right” way to be an LDS mom." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org
"My [new] husband and I started considering starting a family, and I knew that I wanted to have a career. I started researching old conference talks, ensign articles, etc to see what the overall consensus was on women working outside the home, and it was obvious to me that while there was discussion of each woman can choose what's best for herself, the overwhelming expectation was to stay home and not work outside the home. I could only find a few quotes that even suggested it might be okay to work and be a mom. This was so hard for me because I knew that I wanted a career and aspirations outside the home, yet that didn’t seem to be the “right” way to be an LDS mom." - Brooklyn's I Was a Mormon Story | wasmormon.org