Corey’s journey from a devout member of the Mormon Church to an individual outside its walls is a powerful example of courage, intellectual honesty, and the pursuit of truth and genuine faith. Raised in southern Idaho within a large Mormon family, Corey was deeply woven into the fabric of the Church. His identity, values, community, and worldview were all shaped by Mormonism. For years, he embraced the teachings and lived according to the faith’s tenets, sincerely believing in its truth. However, a personal conflict with his bishop set Corey on a path of discovery down the “rabbit hole” that would change everything.
As Corey began to explore the Church’s history and practices outside of official sources, he was confronted with unsettling truths. The more he learned, the more he realized how far removed the Church was from what it claimed to be. His once unshakable faith crumbled as he uncovered evidence of deception, corruption, and betrayal within the institution he had trusted all his life. Yet, through this painful awakening, Corey remained a seeker of truth. He now stands firmly in his belief that his connection to Jesus and living a good Christian life are completely separate from the Mormon Church—a decision that, though difficult, brought him peace and clarity.
I’m a truth seeker who loves video games, sightseeing, hot tubs & pools. I was born into the Mormon church. I grew up in southern Idaho in a large family. Growing up, I was known for being kind, sincere and honest. The Church was my identity, my culture, my world view, my community, my connection to something bigger than myself, my morals and religion, my eternal plan for my life, in short, everything. I was a Mormon.
My wife and I had a severe falling-out with our Mormon bishop. I went online to see if this was common & to see how other Mormons handled it. By doing so, I went down the rabbit hole. I learned the real, true history of the Church. As a result, for the first time, I learned the truth because I had the facts & more objective sources, as opposed to the whitewashed, sanitized, correlated garbage from the Church I had always used previously.
In short, it was obvious that the Church is NOT what it claims, not even close. I saw the Church ‘s endless unchristlike, unrighteous, & sinful behavior. And this horrible behavior is consistent & often intentional. I also realized that I was so ignorant as a TBM (true-believing member). My concerns about Mormonism & the Church are many, sincere & very valid.
I was especially bothered that these so-called men of God lied & said that they didn’t use tithing money on the lavish mall in Salt Lake, which cost billions. They also lied about tithing not being used to pay the high General Authority salaries & overly generous benefits. I was pissed that they exempt themselves from tithing & treat themselves like kings, while the members (whom they’re supposed to serve) get the bare minimum & are neglected & exploited.
I was devastated to learn that the Church is demonstrably false. Yes, Mormonism is made up; indeed, Mormonism is a scam. Having studied Mormonism all my life (including both sides: for & against) the only logical, valid conclusion is this: Mormonism does NOT hold up against scrutiny, especially Mormonism’s truth claims. A simple internet search can make the Church fall apart. The evidence strongly suggests that the Mormon church is not true—it’s made up & based on lies, etc.
Alarmingly, on top of learning that the Church is not true, I realized that I’d been lied to, manipulated, gaslighted, exploited, betrayed & wronged by the Church my entire life. I discovered the concepts of elevation emotion & frisson. With this new knowledge of elevation emotion & frisson, and the knowledge I gained from studying Church history the previous 4 years, I used my critical thinking skills & evaluated my most influential spiritual experiences.
I was shocked & horrified to see that my spiritual experiences were not at all what I believed & had been taught in the Church. Almost all of my significant spiritual experiences were easily explained by elevation emotion, frisson, confirmation bias, & other things that had nothing to do with God, or the Spirit teaching me the truth. In short, my so-called spiritual experiences had betrayed me. My treasured spiritual experiences had confirmed the truthfulness of many things that were false or only partially true. I also learned that my so-called spiritual experiences were not unique: to me or Mormonism. Most people have the same so-called spiritual experiences about their religion that I had experienced with Mormonism. Most people believe that God has told them that their church is true & that God called them to join it.
Learning this greatly disturbed & unsettled me spiritually & caused another faith crisis, though much less severe this time. Any small testimony I had left of the Church was destroyed. I no longer connected my Church membership to following Jesus. The two were completely separate in my mind. In my experience & in my opinion, being a Mormon had nothing to do with following Jesus & living a good Christian life. If you’re a good Christian, you’re a bad Mormon. Conversely, if you’re a bad Christian, you’re a good Mormon. I’d rather be a good Christian.
Leaving the Church is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I still think of myself as a Christian, as I still believe in God & Jesus. I’m also working out what exactly I believe. I have a lot of questions & there’s a lot I don’t know. However, one thing I do know is that I want nothing to do with the Mormon Church. As someone once said, what’s good about Mormonism is not unique. And what’s unique about Mormonism is not good.
Corey
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