As a teenager on the cusp of her senior year in high school, she found herself drawn to the teachings of the Mormon faith, intrigued by its promises of spiritual fulfillment and belonging. Despite initial skepticism, Nancy’s interest was piqued by Joseph Smith’s first vision, a story that resonated with her own quest for understanding and meaning.
Embracing the Mormon faith as a golden convert, her journey took a turn as she confronted the discrepancies and contradictions within the church’s teachings. Over the years, as doubts and questions continued to mount, Nancy grappled with the realization that the church she had once embraced was not the beacon of truth she had hoped for.
In the end, Nancy’s journey led her to a profound realization: she no longer needed a true church, only a good one – and that the Mormon church was neither true or good. With courage and conviction, she made the decision to step away from Mormonism, reclaiming her autonomy and finding happiness on her own terms.
I was a golden convert. I was a Mormon.
I was a teenager about to enter my senior year in high school. At the time I had many friends converting to versions of Evangelical Christianity. I was a little skeptical of their teachings. I also had a friend who was Mormon. After a lot of discussion I agreed to the missionary lessons. I was skeptical of the Book of Mormon, it seemed like a significant portion of it was copied from the King James Bible.
However Joseph Smith’s first vision resonated with me because he was of similar age as me at the time and seeking the truth like I was. I agreed to be baptized because it was the only church that made sense to me. They also assured me that polygamy was no longer practiced, which would have been a dealbreaker.
Almost from the moment I was baptized I started to feel less than. First I was told my clothes were immodest. Then that I was too fat. (I wasn’t, I was within normal weight for my height) I dieted got very thin and came down with an eating disorder. That was just the beginning.
As time went by I learned I wasn’t told the full truth about polygamy when I discovered widowers (but not widows) could have more than one wife in the hereafter. Then in college I learned the truth about The Book of Abraham. I knew it wasn’t an anti-Mormon lie because I learned it in my Pearl of Great Price class.
Over the years, as more stuff piled onto my proverbial faith shelf, I came to decide that I didn’t need a true church, just a good one.
Then the the treatment of LGBTQ people, backtracking on whether being gay was a choice and then not admitting the mistake, as well as the purity culture teaching that women who had sexual relationships before marriage were like chewed gum challenged even that.
I finally had to admit it wasn’t a good church, much less a true one.
I came to this conclusion without reading/listening to anything critical of the church or challenging its truth claims. I’m a slow study but in 40+ years I finally made my way out. I am unequivocally happy now.
Nancy
This is a spotlight on a profile shared at wasmormon.org. These are just the highlights, so please find the full story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/nancypantsy72/. There are stories of Mormon faith journeys contributed by hundreds of users like you. Come check them out and consider sharing your own story at wasmormon.org!
When creating a profile, you may select a privacy level you are comfortable with. There are options to display a profile publicly, to not receive a spotlight on social media, to keep it private to only other site members, or to have the profile completely unlisted. wasmormorg.org is for you to share your story how you want, not to dox you.