Noal’s journey is a testament to the incredible courage it takes to choose authenticity over acceptance. For 30 years, he lived a carefully constructed life—checking every Mormon box from baptism to temple marriage, from mission to fatherhood—all while knowing deep inside who he truly was. He gave everything he had to be loved and accepted by his family and church, performing the role expected of him with dedication and sacrifice.
But there comes a moment when pretending becomes unbearable, when the weight of living a lie grows too heavy to carry. Noal faced that crossroads with remarkable bravery: he could run, or he could choose to live as his authentic self and be the best person and father possible. He chose truth. Though that choice cost him dearly—losing the very acceptance he had worked so hard to earn—Noal discovered something far more valuable: genuine self-love and the kind of unconditional love that comes from living honestly.
Today, married to his wonderful husband and surrounded by love that doesn’t require pretense, Noal embodies the peace that comes from refusing to hide. His story reminds us that sometimes the greatest act of faith is having faith in yourself.
Hi! I’m Noal. I believed it all to be accepted and loved. It was all a lie. I was a mormon.
I was born into and raised LDS. My biological family gave me the standard middle class upbringing with many happy memories and with many nightmares. Inside me I knew who I was but I lived a lie for 30 years just to make everyone else happy. I did everything I could to be loved and accepted by my parents, family and the Church.
I was Baptized, Priesthood, Seminary Council, Eagle Scout, Endowments, Mission, Married in the temple, College including a Masters degree, 3 incredible and beautiful children, many callings and service projects. I gave all I was able to give. And when I was finally exhausted of hiding and pretending, when I was full of all of the lies and abuse, I had to make a decision. I could run or I could continue to live and try to be the best person & father possible. I chose to live.
While I was free from hiding and able to live my true life, everything turned away from me. I was never perfect. I made a lot of mistakes. I’ve paid a lot of dues. I’ve lost everything and then some.
Every mistake I’ve have made was used to learn and become who I am. But the biggest lessons I’ve learned in life have taught me that everything in this existence is about money and control. Especially in the LDS Church.
I left the Mormon Church because all of the lies, abuse, cover up, dishonesty and deceit. All wrapped in a pretty bow using religion and fear and greed to control people. I’ve always had questions about the gospel and the unlimited and uncontrolled religions power over people. But it came down to the simple fact that when I needed someone the most, everyone turned on me. It was confirmed in me that nothing good comes from religion. And all the lies became clear.
Life is very different now. I am married to my wonderful husband and we have two incredible dogs. I have learned to love me. I have been at the bottom many times. I have grown to the person that has lived a true and authentic life. One which has freely given me true unconditional love. I am honored and humbled by it all.
Noal
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