When members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints begin questioning their beliefs or choose to leave the faith, a common reaction from church leaders and apologists is to attempt to explain why—often without actually asking those who have left. Instead of listening to real stories, they offer narratives that serve to protect the institution.
This pattern is evident in a recent comment by popular LDS apologist Jared Halverson, who featured in a Faith Matters short. He describes why, as he sees it, many are leaving the church. He describes a shift in why people leave the Mormon Church. In the past, he says, people left mainly because they questioned its truth claims—things like history, doctrine, and issues like the Book of Abraham. But today, many are leaving not because they doubt its truth, but because they question its goodness.
Concerns about social issues—such as LGBTQ+ inclusion and women’s roles—are now at the forefront. People are asking: Can I be a good, kind, Christian person and still stay in this church? Halverson notes that these moral and social concerns are causing more women to leave and are leading people to seek spiritual fulfillment outside the church when they feel the church isn’t living up to its potential to bless and uplift.
I think in some ways people used to leave the church because they didn’t think it was true and now people are leaving the church because they don’t think that it’s good. And there’s this sense of the historical and the propositional, well, did this happen and what about the book of Abraham, and so on.
Whereas now how can I in good conscience, stay in the church and stay friends with my LGBT Brothers and sisters? How do I do this? How can I navigate women’s place in the church? It’s much more of a social side of things than a historical doctrinal side of things. I think we’ve shifted in that, and I think that also helps explain some of the reasons that we’re seeing women leave churches at a quicker rate than men.
The church can be as true as you wanna say it is. If it’s not nice. If it’s not kind, if it’s not good, can I feel Christian in the church? I’m hearing a lot of people that are wrestling with those kinds of questions. They want to contribute and bless and lift and save, and all the things that the church is well poised to be able to do, and in their own experience or in their perspective, they’re not seeing it as much as they’d like, and so many are leaving to find spiritual experiences elsewhere.
Jared Halverson on Why are people leaving the LDS Church? – Can Doubt be a Spiritual Gift? – Faith Matters
https://www.faithmatters.org/p/jared-halverson-and-terryl-givens
https://www.instagram.com/p/DJkZs-rBE2f/
This originates from clips that are stitched together from this discussion between Terryl Givens and Jared Halverson, which is helpful to refer to for full context.
Terryl Givens: So let’s talk a little bit about those who choose not to come or not to stay. So about 25 years ago, I developed a class at the University of Richmond called Belief and Doubt in Life and Literature. So this is a secular university. I think that’s one reason why I said belief rather than faith. Belief is cast a wider net. The class always filled up. This was when I first became aware of the prevalence of of this phenomenon of wrestling and struggling with faith.
So I teach that course now at BYU once a year. My last class this semester was just a few days ago. And I filled the board, right, with these different reasons, explanations. What struck me was what was missing from the list. It was the thing that would have been at the top of the list 20 years ago. and that was history questions. Not that those don’t occur, but certainly they’re not anywhere near the top of the list anymore.
Now, in part, I think that’s because the church historical department under Marlon Jensen was like years ahead of the rest of the church. and it was under Marlon Jensen’s leadership that we did the Joseph Smith Papers Project, that we did the New Saints History, that we did the Gospel Topics Essays. So it’s harder and harder to claim, well, I didn’t know, or the church didn’t let out or teach this. What changes have you seen in what’s on the radar?
Jared Halverson: It definitely has shifted from, well to make it, to simplify it, and probably oversimplify it. It’s in large part shifted from head to heart. I don’t think that’s an entirely bad thing, by the way, but as opposed to the kind of knowledge-based historical questions, doctrinal questions, those kinds of things, for better or worse, people seem to care a little less about history and theology. Brace yourself: We need to care more about both. As a theologian and a historian, we can claim that.
I think, again, to oversimplify it, I think in some ways people used to leave the church because they didn’t think it was true. And now people are leaving the church because they don’t think that it’s good. And there’s this sense of the historical and the propositional, well, did this happen? And what about the book of Abraham? And so on. Whereas now, How can I in good conscience stay in the church and stay friends with my LGBT brothers and sisters? How do I do this? How can I navigate women’s place in the church? It’s much more of a social side of things than a historical doctrinal side of things. I think we’ve shifted in that.
And I think that also helps explain some of the reasons that we’re seeing women leave churches at a quicker rate than men.
Terryl Givens: That’s very recent development, right?
Jared Halverson: Exactly. Very, very recent. And I think that’s also indicative of that shift from head to heart, where there is more the kind of the Adam approach of I want to be right with God and the Eve approach I want to do right by neighbor right. And if the male standpoint is typically vertical and the female is more horizontal or loving God versus loving neighbor, the church can be as true as you want it to, as you want to say it is, if it’s not nice if it’s not kind if it’s not good… Can I feel Christian in the church? And I think as people are struggling with that, I’m hearing a lot of people that are wrestling with those kinds of questions. And it’s personal, it’s visceral, because everybody wants to be good. And down deep, they want to know that they’re good and they want to be part of a good organization and something that’s making a difference in the world. They want to contribute and bless and lift and save and all the things that the church is well poised to be able to do. And in their own experience or in their perspective, they’re not seeing it as much as they’d like. And so many are leaving to find spiritual experiences elsewhere.
I would say also some of them are struggling to have spiritual experiences, which is tragic. I’ll often ask them, tell me about your experiences with God, because they’ll often say when I’m talking with young people, especially one on one, they’ll say, well, I’m spiritual, not religious. And I’m like, I’ve heard that too. Awesome. If you had to choose between the two, I think you picked the better part.
I’ve got a friend who self-proclaimed, I’m religious, not spiritual. I’m like, I don’t know if that’s any better. I don’t want to claim that either. There shouldn’t be mutually exclusive. You know me, I love proving contrary. So can we be spiritual and religious?
But then I’ll ask them, if you’re spiritual but not religious, tell me about your spirituality. Tell me about your connections with God. And it’s so interesting that often I’ll just hear them vent more and more about the church. And I’m like, okay, I get that. I understand. I’m sorry your experiences with church were negative. Tell me more about your experience with God, though. That’s what I asked. And then they rush back and keep talking about church. And I was like, ah, I actually wonder if the opposite was true. And that for whatever reason, you grew up only being religious. and never really learning how to be spiritual. You learned the dance steps, but never heard the music. And now you’re… I’m surprised you lasted this long just being part of an organization when you weren’t getting the spiritual help and strength from it that you were looking for.
Jared Halverson & Terryl Givens: Can Doubt be a Spiritual Gift? – Faith Matters, May 11, 2025
https://www.faithmatters.org/p/jared-halverson-and-terryl-givens
At first glance, Halverson’s comment may sound empathetic. He acknowledges real concerns—LGBTQ issues, women’s roles, and the moral character of the institution. But beneath that surface is a subtle dismissal. By framing these departures as people now simply leaving because the church isn’t “nice” or “good,” Halverson implies that these are superficial or emotional reactions, rather than deeply moral or spiritual reckonings.
This is a familiar apologist move: reframing others’ beliefs in the most manageable way possible. Rather than confront the profound ethical and doctrinal issues that lead people out of the church, he suggests the problem lies in shifting social attitudes. In doing so, he avoids validating the sincerity, depth, and diversity of reasons people actually give for leaving. This isn’t the first time he’s done this. He was called out for mansplaining to women about why they are leaving the church in droves. He ended up accidentally making the point that women are typically more numerous than men in religion, but strictly speaking of an “in the pew” rather than an “at the pulpit” context. Essentially, he’s puzzling why women are leaving an organization in which they have no representaiton. It’s not a hard jump to make.
When Halverson says people used to leave because they didn’t think the church was true, he participates in a common oversimplification. The reality is, people still leave because they no longer believe it is true—and many of them arrive at that conclusion because they discovered troubling things about the church’s history or doctrine. These issues haven’t disappeared; they’ve only grown more accessible. The internet, libraries, archives, podcasts, and even sites like wasmormon.org, allow ordinary people to research their faith—and for many, that process leads to a loss of belief in the foundational truth claims of the church.
It’s also not a new phenomenon for people to leave because they feel the church isn’t good. From the very beginning, people have been troubled by moral inconsistencies, especially in areas like polygamy, racism, and authoritarianism. What’s changed is that more people today feel empowered to act on those convictions, and to publicly speak about them.
When Elder Dale Renlund recently offered the metaphor of “whack-a-mole” for difficult church history topics—implying that for every question answered, more will pop up—it reinforced the idea that sincere seekers are a nuisance rather than faithful questioners. And his earlier parable of the “old fisherman” warned members not to trust people who talk about messy church history, calling them immature and ungrateful. This kind of rhetoric sends a message: don’t listen to those who leave; let us explain them to you. Perhaps the new metaphor could be the whack-a-mole game of trying to find any goodness in the church, where as soon as you think you find something good, it falls apart due to the harm the church causes.
If you truly want to understand why people leave the LDS Church, you have to listen to those who leave. At wasmormon.org, we host hundreds of stories from former Latter-day Saints who have taken the difficult, often painful journey of reevaluating their beliefs. These are not caricatures. These are real people who loved their faith, served missions, married in temples, and gave their lives to what they thought was God’s true church—only to find that the truth claims couldn’t hold up, or the culture of the church was doing harm, or both.
Each story is different. Some leave because of historical deception, others because of LGBTQ exclusion, and many because they no longer feel that the church reflects the goodness it claims to represent. And many wrestle with all of these things. Reducing these complex transitions to a shift from “truth” to “social issues” misses the point entirely. It isn’t an either/or. People leave the church because of both historical problems and moral concerns. And it’s rarely a shallow or sudden decision.
Apologists like Halverson may think they mean well, but their framing too often ends up painting those who leave as confused, culturally influenced, or morally impatient—rather than honest, thoughtful, and deeply ethical. This is why telling your story matters.
If you’ve gone through your own faith transition, consider sharing it. The more we tell our stories, the harder it becomes for others to misrepresent them. The church and its defenders may try to define you—but when you speak for yourself, you reclaim that power.
At wasmormon.org, we believe in giving voice to those who have been silenced. Your story is valid. Your journey matters. Let’s ensure that those seeking truth and goodness can hear from real people—not just those speaking on their behalf.
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