Hi, I'm Tom
I'm a family man, engineer, hobby musician, and podcaster. I was a Mormon.
I was born and raised in the church to a very faithful and loving family. I have been active in the church my entire life and served a full-time 2 year mission in the United States. I was married to my wife shortly after my mission and we now have two beautiful children. Since transitioning away from the church, I have started the Alternative Mormon podcast for those who want a place to explore Mormonism and other religions in a non-threatening way. So basically the target audience is active members who want to better understand faith crises, non-orthodox/nuanced members, and those who leave the church but aren't trying to tear it down.
Today I still believe in God and I consider myself a Christian - although it is a much more passive or agnostic belief nowadays. I value family and serving others. I think Jesus is a great example of the kind of life we should live and how to treat others, but I constantly fall short of that mark. But I have dropped my perfectionistic tendencies in that regard and I'm okay with trying but falling short.
On my shelf
On the Mormon Spectrum
Why I left More answers about 'Why I left' the mormon church
Most of my life in the church I have had questions and doubts. My faith transition was a very long journey, not an overnight experience after reading certain pieces of anti material like for some people. Every question or doubt I had I would lean into and try to build a framework to make the answer work. I have even joked that during my mission I was a hobby apologist of sorts, always willing to tackle the tough stuff people I taught would bring up.
Cracks in my framework began to show up overtime. Two things were the final straw for my testimony. The first was having children and considering the truthfulness with regards to what I would teach them and wanting to make sure I was right. The second was when my wife came to me and opened up about some of her faith struggles. With one final deep dive into the issues with her we both realized we needed to reevaluate our beliefs.
Questions about Mormons My Answers to Questions about Mormonism
Are you lazy? Is that why you left? See more answers about 'Are you lazy? Is that why you left?'
No. I hate the "lazy learner" stereotype. It would have been more lazy to just coast and stay in the church and never investigate.
Do you consider yourself a Christian? See more answers about 'Do you consider yourself a Christian?'
Yes. There is still a lot unknown to me, but at a minimum I believe there is a higher power. For me, I think that higher power is Jesus and I have reasons for that belief. But I am probably more of a Christian Agnostic. I hope in Christ and try to be a good person, but at the end of the day I really don't know.
Did you want to sin? Is that why you left? See more answers about 'Did you want to sin? Is that why you left?'
No. The "sins" I have done since leaving the church are minor and laughable (i.e. drinking coffee) all of which I could easily give up if I knew the church was true.
Has your struggle improved since you left? See more answers about 'Has your struggle improved since you left?'
Yes, I have so much more peace and happiness and I can read about the church or the scriptures without constant cognitive dissonance.
Do you believe the Book of Mormon is true? See more answers about 'Do you believe the Book of Mormon is true?'
No not in the sense that it was a historical record. But I believe it has true principles in it (i.e. love God, take care of others, etc.) and who know maybe God even inspired some of it. But ultimately, I have good reason to believe it's a work of fiction