What are your thoughts about leaving the church alone?

I don't pick fights. I only stand up for myself when targeted, bullied, or attacked for my non-belief.

Unfortunately the general leadership (and sometimes local members) will take it upon themselves to speak unkindly of those who've left the faith. Comments can range from name calling, or marginalizing former members by minimizing their experience and reasons for leaving.

As a former member who was incredibly devout, I find it insulting and hurtful when I'm belittled simply because I no longer believe.

I try hard to be respectful to all members of the church, but sometimes that kindness isn't reciprocated. In moments like those, I speak out.

curtishartley

How can you leave something alone after it dictated the course of your entire life? The church caused me a great deal of harm and when I speak about that and am told to “leave it alone” it’s dismissive and hurtful. The church is so much a part of who I am I don't think I'll ever be able to fully leave Mormonism behind me, but I am moving forward. 

bethlundgreen

The church didn't leave me alone for 50+ years. The church has over 50,000 people out at any given time for the purpose of trying to convince others to abandon their faith, cultures, and traditions, and it asks its members to assist in that missionary effort. When the church leaves other people alone, then it can then start to criticize others for not leaving the church alone.

swordsman1989

This question is very sensitive for me. Being a mormon was everything to me for 38 years. I was my entire identity. I had no identity outside of being a mormon. Everything I did was because of my religion. After deconstructing and learning the truth and lies about the church, I was devastated. Everything I thought I new and held as truth was in question. It has been immensely helpful for me to research and discuss and share about my experience with the church. The more I talk about my experience and what I've learned, the more I become content with who I now am and at peace with where I am at in my life. There's no way, at this time, I could "leave the church alone" because it was all I was for my entire life. It is possible that some day I won't feel the need to discuss mormonism or its effects on me, and I hope that day does come. But anyone who feels the need to discuss their issues with mormonism as part of their deconstruction has my full support.
Active members share constantly their testimonies on social media and even door-to-door, face-to-face. They don't worry about being offensive or off-putting in their declarations of truth. Those of us being just as verbal on the other side are trying to do the same as them - share our truth. They share was is meaningful and important to them - we are simply doing the same.

debrac28

It's lonely. I'm also glad I did it. It's made me the person I am today.

kf7heh

I was taught to share truth.

I served a mission to share truth.

What I thought was true, is not.

Now, I continue to share truth. The message is different, but it is the truth.

That's why I created this website, I needed to share my truth. Doubt and questions and leaving is so stigmatized I wanted to do something to tell my story and allow others to do the same. I found it cathartic to share my story, and processes some of the post-mormon baggage I carry. That was a great weight lifted, it was a fruit of deconstruction and I desire all to receive it.

evan-mullins