Monthly Archives: January 2023

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My second son left the church and I wanted to know why. He shared what information he had about the history of the church and before too long, I had read all of that and so much more. It was a terrible time for me and I felt quite suicidal. I didn't know who I was if, after 39 years, I was no longer 'Sister Bodie', the bishop's wife, the branch president's wife, the seminary teacher etc.
My second son left the church and I wanted to know why. He shared what information he had about the history of the church and before too long, I had read all of that and so much more. It was a terrible time for me and I felt quite suicidal. I didn't know who I was if, after 39 years, I was no longer 'Sister Bodie', the bishop's wife, the branch president's wife, the seminary teacher etc.
GOD DIDN'T PROTECT US. We were wearing our temple garment underwear, we were being faithful by serving a mission and yet... I didn't give up on the church over that of course but it did begin a series of questions about why and why God seemed to have abandoned Africa
GOD DIDN'T PROTECT US. We were wearing our temple garment underwear, we were being faithful by serving a mission and yet... I didn't give up on the church over that of course but it did begin a series of questions about why and why God seemed to have abandoned Africa
I could not settle into the old way of life knowing that people in Africa were hungry, needed education and jobs, so we raised money and went back to our old mission area to give out micro loans for people to start their own businesses. WHY doesn't the church do that?
I could not settle into the old way of life knowing that people in Africa were hungry, needed education and jobs, so we raised money and went back to our old mission area to give out micro loans for people to start their own businesses. WHY doesn't the church do that?
I was not taught to think critically and was trained in religious thought by my school and the Church of England. I believed in 'God' and thought that everyone else believed in the same way. I was excited when as a young wife and mother of two small children the missionaries from the Mormon Church knocked on our door and proceeded to teach us about 'true religion'. We joined and later moved to Canada.
I was not taught to think critically and was trained in religious thought by my school and the Church of England. I believed in 'God' and thought that everyone else believed in the same way. I was excited when as a young wife and mother of two small children the missionaries from the Mormon Church knocked on our door and proceeded to teach us about 'true religion'. We joined and later moved to Canada.
As seniors my husband and I served a mission to Capetown, South Africa. On our second day in the country, we were involved in a road accident in the mission's Volkswagen van. We were passengers in the back seat and received the worst injuries. My husband's neck was broken, my back and many other bones. We had cuts and bruising everywhere.
As seniors my husband and I served a mission to Capetown, South Africa. On our second day in the country, we were involved in a road accident in the mission's Volkswagen van. We were passengers in the back seat and received the worst injuries. My husband's neck was broken, my back and many other bones. We had cuts and bruising everywhere.
The shelf breaking is a demoralizing, crushing experience. What hurt the most was the feeling that I had nowhere to turn. Looking back I see the extreme cultural pressure on people to stay active, to "stay in the boat", to stay away from "anti-mormon" influences. This builds an unhealthy community of fear, judgment, and shame for anyone who feels on the fringes. What's worse is this is the community that I had given everything to. Feeling betrayed about the control of information was hard, but feeling like the community I gave my life to had no place for me was even worse.
The shelf breaking is a demoralizing, crushing experience. What hurt the most was the feeling that I had nowhere to turn. Looking back I see the extreme cultural pressure on people to stay active, to "stay in the boat", to stay away from "anti-mormon" influences. This builds an unhealthy community of fear, judgment, and shame for anyone who feels on the fringes. What's worse is this is the community that I had given everything to. Feeling betrayed about the control of information was hard, but feeling like the community I gave my life to had no place for me was even worse.