How do you currently feel about the church?

I am angry. I am so fucking angry at them for the religous trauma and gaslighting they brought me. I am angry they made me stay in denial for years. It's not an anger that comes from hate, but love.

amethystp

Disappointed.

My first and biggest challenge relates to the concept of "continuous revelation" that the Mormon church claims to be built on.
For over 3 decades I proudly raised my hand to sustain 15 men as prophets, seers, and revealers, yet they are not able to clarify a number of core questions pertaining the church history (ranging from practices, teachings, and decisions made by past top leaders).
Technically, they could even turn to the seer stone in their possession for some answers, but it seems they don't like that option as well.
The BOM itself (see 2 Nephi 26:33), explains that God "doeth nothing save it be plain unto the children of men". In other words, clarity is the "manner of God". And if it's not done in the manner of God, then it's priestcraft (as the rest of that chapter is all about).
That said, I wonder, where is the clarity when it comes to Brigham Young introducing the priesthood ban (and where is the revelation that he received about such an impactful change)?
Where is the clarity when it comes to the translation of the BOM or when it comes to Joseph Smith's polygamy or the masonry-like temple endowment ritual and so forth?
My second big challenge pertains just the fallibility of these 15 men.
The equation seems to sound like this:
"Until they get it right, then they are prophets called from God. But if they don't, well, it has to be accepted that sometimes their humanity gets in the way. You're still supposed to follow."
So, for example, if you would happen to be born black in the first half of the 1900's, you were expected to give up the priesthood and the critical-to-salvation temple ordinances as part of your devotion to God, only to discover less than a century later that the Mormon church now "disavows" this supposedly inspired-by-God directive...
Wow... and no, something is clearly off with this approach.
Third challenge: tithing.
I never had a problem to pay a tenth of my income, it was just natural to me to contribute to the growth of the kingdom.
It was only in the past few years, though, that the temple recommend question about the tithing payment started to make less sense...
I get that the temples have operating costs and I'm totally ok to chat about my church attendance and moral conduct, but does God really measure my worthiness based on a tenth of income regularly submitted in order to enter His house?
The same verse from the BOM shared above quotes that God "inviteth [all the children of men] to come unto Him and partake of His goodness; and He denieth none that come unto Him", which translated means "no actual membership fee expected".
Also, I can't really ignore how rich the Mormon church is today and how easily the temples could be run without expecting a dime from its members. Yet, although the Mormon church has changed the temple endowment structure multiple times just in the past 2 decades, the pecuniary expectation of the tithing has never been reviewed...
On the contrary, it went from an originally 2% paid after debts and family needs to a 10% to be paid no matter the circumstance, and from a voluntary offer to a temple access restraining condition.
Apart from the above personal conflicts, I wouldn't be fair if I highlighted just what I don't understand.
So, since I like fairness, I'll mention a few good things that I love about the Mormon church.
On a humanitarian level, I appreciate the way the Mormon church reacts to emergency situations (such as natural disasters) and strives to bring relief around the world (where there is extreme poverty).
On a community level, I cannot deny that belonging to a "healthy" LDS branch/ward can be fun, it provides a network that you don't find so easily elsewhere and opportunities to connect with new people, and it tests your resolution to follow Jesus.

antares

This is always a tricky one for ex-mormons. It took a long time and a lot of work on my end to heal and move past the anger. Now, I am fine coexisting with members of the church. I am always very honest with them, kind and respectful of how they choose to live. I think the people are usually very nice and want to do good for the world, but the doctrine and leadership of the church is where the harm lies.

cdj319

I feel disconnected

lacey

I don't hate the church and I have nothing against the members. I'm still friends with all the same people in the church that I was friends with before I left. But I do have a natural mistrust toward the church now because I know it was a huge source of lies that controlled me for 32 years of my life.

ladylunafication

I hate it, and I enjoy watching it bring itself down with its own hubris. It’s a church of lies, and it needs to go away. If the church is going to survive this hemorrhage of members, they will have to drastically downsize from a religious organization to a society, like the Masons or Shriners.