What role does religion or spirituality play in your life now? What does it mean to you?

I think I'm an agnostic pagan. I could call myself a hellenic polytheist since both goddesses I worship are greek/hellenic, but I'd rather just call myself a pagan. I'm certainly not an expert on paganism but I try to learn as much about it as possible. My spirituality is a very big deal to me. I've had more spiritual experiences with them then the mormon god ever gave me. I guess I'm kind of a thiestic agnostic too, because I can't prove that god(s) exist, and I don't know that they exist, but I still, for the most part, believe they exist. I also find the sacred in nature - I worship the rocks and streams and the moon and sky because everything in nature feels alive and sacred. My spirituality makes me so happy and grateful for my existence. My self esteem is getting better, and every time I look in the mirror, I can think "wow, I'm beautiful. I am divine and worthy of my own love." without worrying about being prideful. It means so much to me.

amethystp

The one thing I clung to after Mormonism was a belief in "something." I don't accept that existence is meaningless or a random chance. There has to be a reason that there is Something instead of Nothing. Otherwise life is just an absurdity hanging over an abyss. Truth, Beauty, and Goodness are real.
So I started a 10-year search. In my reading and exploring I felt that the fundamental question that a religion had to answer was the Problem of Suffering. Why is there evil and suffering in the world? I found only 2 satisfactory answers, in Buddhism (transcend suffering) or in Christianity (embrace suffering). And of those 2, I found the Christian answer to be more compelling.
I also extensively studied Biblical scholarship--the real stuff, not pop theology or pop criticism. I learned to understand that the Bible is an anthology of writings, in various genres, and that it is not to be idolized. I also learned to think about it in new ways. And to see where and how it was supported by history.
This led me to the crisis point: did I accept the resurrection of Jesus as a real event? This was a leap of faith, of course, but God's grace led me to belief. And eventually, to join the Body of Christ as configured in the Catholic Church.
That is a very short summary of years of thinking, praying and struggling.