If you have remained active or semi-active in the church as a non-believer or semi-believer, why do you remain active?
After I realized I no longer believed the church was true, I spent several years fighting my faith transition, because I was still afraid to admit it.
Accepting my disillusionment was heartbreaking. The culture of fear the church instilled in me was so powerful and I slipped into a double life where I conducted my life authentically with some people and put on a façade with others. I was too scared to admit what I believed for fear of judgement, fear of hurting people, and the fear of not knowing how to live my life fully outside Mormonism.
