Hello, I'm dethkult!
I was a Mormon.
About me
I, Derhkult was born of goodly parents in the year of our lord one thousand, nine hundred and eighty one. And it came to pass that verily I was raised in a small branch in Prince Rupert Brittish Columbia Canda, which is very liberal in its sentiments and views of the world. My mother is a convert but my father hails from Cardston Alberta Canada, which is where Zina Huntington, one of the plural wives of Joseph Smith essentially retired. it's very traditionally mormon. like Logan Utah mormon I imagine although I never have been to Utah. There was a lot of conflict between life ideas and worldviews growing up liberal and mormon at the same time, with the expectation that my right wing conservative, Christian nationalist identity would win out over secular liberalism. or I'm a bad person. lots of family politics. As an adult I moved to Alberta, which is very traditional among mormons and I found out that the life ideas that I internalized growing up weren't compatible with my peers in the young single adult congregations. I attended 2 of those congregations for the span of 9 years, allowing myself to be guilt tripped into attending even though I hated the culture and wanted to date different women with different opinions and interests. I then left the church physically and left Calgary for 6 years but still felt guilty and condemned for leaving. I officially resigned from the church in 2017 after I read Recovering Agency: Lifting the Veil of Mormon Mind Control by Luna Lindsay and now I co host for a local support group for ex jw's and exmormons in the Calgary Alberta area called After The Truth. I never married.
# Why I left More stories of 'Why I left' the Mormon church
It was a lot of things over years and decades. Reading Dune and it's sequels by Frank Herbert got me considering what if the church was a group kinda like the Bene Gesserite or basically a societal control group using propaganda and manipulation back in 2002. I was treated badly by my mormon relatives for not being mormon enough, my entire childhood becuase of the liberal secular influence in my life opinions and sentiments. That's what started it. over the years I kept questioning and found out little tidbits like the rock in the hat, the godmakers cartoon. Adam God Doctrine, researching Winston Blackmore and his polygamy cult in Creston BC. Recovering Agency helped me define all the things I couldn't quite put my finger on during the 9 years in the ysa. I've been through multiple reactivation attempts where I was being gaslit and I generally found lds culture to be ignorant, insular, ethnocentric and parochial, lacking any ability to critically examine things or engage in thoughtful discussions.