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"The claim that we were the "only true church on earth" never set well with me growing up. As a young kid, my family used to take road trips across the country, stopping at national parks and historical landmarks along the way. One year, I remember stopping at the National Civil Rights Museum in Memphis, Tennessee and experiencing a major moment of cognitive dissonance--on one hand, I abhorred racism and systems that excluded others based on their differences, and yet I realized that my own Church had deeply rooted exclusionary beliefs (i.e. "we're the one and only", etc)." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"The claim that we were the "only true church on earth" never set well with me growing up. As a young kid, my family used to take road trips across the country, stopping at national parks and historical landmarks along the way. One year, I remember stopping at the National Civil Rights Museum in Memphis, Tennessee and experiencing a major moment of cognitive dissonance--on one hand, I abhorred racism and systems that excluded others based on their differences, and yet I realized that my own Church had deeply rooted exclusionary beliefs (i.e. "we're the one and only", etc)." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I had a close family member leave the Church due to historical concerns. History has always been something that I gravitated towards, and Church history was one of the only spaces I believed, at the time, I could truly feel the spirit. I was puzzled and confused why this family member would leave the Church over something I found so inspiring. It also troubled me to see how they were treated by those around me--again, because of exclusionary beliefs." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I had a close family member leave the Church due to historical concerns. History has always been something that I gravitated towards, and Church history was one of the only spaces I believed, at the time, I could truly feel the spirit. I was puzzled and confused why this family member would leave the Church over something I found so inspiring. It also troubled me to see how they were treated by those around me--again, because of exclusionary beliefs." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I was fortunate to have the sympathetic ear of my spouse, who chose to love me for me, and not merely for my Church membership. Coming from a space where I once felt I had all of the answers, it was difficult for me at first to get comfortable saying "I dont know." However, I began to realize that no one has the answers and the most important thing I can do is focus on living in the here and now. Little by little, I began creating my own meaning in this life." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I was fortunate to have the sympathetic ear of my spouse, who chose to love me for me, and not merely for my Church membership. Coming from a space where I once felt I had all of the answers, it was difficult for me at first to get comfortable saying "I dont know." However, I began to realize that no one has the answers and the most important thing I can do is focus on living in the here and now. Little by little, I began creating my own meaning in this life." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I thought I had known Church History, I studied it extensively in college and throughout my life. I had used Church approved sources and stayed away from "anti-Mormon material". But I began to realize there were certain areas of history that had been withheld from me--critical areas. The full extent of Joseph Smith's polygamy and polyandry rocked my testimony, the full context surrounding the Church's black priesthood ban was tough to swallow, and the more unfiltered history I researched in this position, the more I came to realize how "man-made" (not "God-made") the Church really was." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I thought I had known Church History, I studied it extensively in college and throughout my life. I had used Church approved sources and stayed away from "anti-Mormon material". But I began to realize there were certain areas of history that had been withheld from me--critical areas. The full extent of Joseph Smith's polygamy and polyandry rocked my testimony, the full context surrounding the Church's black priesthood ban was tough to swallow, and the more unfiltered history I researched in this position, the more I came to realize how "man-made" (not "God-made") the Church really was." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I'm sharing my story not because I'm still angry at the Church or because I want to tear people down. I'm sharing my story because I know there are thousands of people in my situation. People who feel hurt, unheard, or broken. I hope my story will be a small step in helping people gather up their broken pieces. I know that's what other people did for me when my shelf broke--I hope I can be there in a similar way for others." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I'm sharing my story not because I'm still angry at the Church or because I want to tear people down. I'm sharing my story because I know there are thousands of people in my situation. People who feel hurt, unheard, or broken. I hope my story will be a small step in helping people gather up their broken pieces. I know that's what other people did for me when my shelf broke--I hope I can be there in a similar way for others." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"About three years into my undergraduate studies in college, I decided to take an internship in the Church History Department with the Gospel Topics Essays to confront some of these historical issues head on. I thought (naively) that if I could understand where this family member was coming from, maybe I could bring bring them back into activity. However, it was during this internship that I learned the full, unfiltered history of the Church for the first time." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"About three years into my undergraduate studies in college, I decided to take an internship in the Church History Department with the Gospel Topics Essays to confront some of these historical issues head on. I thought (naively) that if I could understand where this family member was coming from, maybe I could bring bring them back into activity. However, it was during this internship that I learned the full, unfiltered history of the Church for the first time." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I come from a long line of mormon pioneer ancestry. I was born and raised in a small Southern Utah town, and grew up with the Church as a major part of my upbringing. Served a mission and was married in the Provo City Center Temple. I completed a Bachelor's degree in History at Utah Valley University. As part of my undergraduate training, I did an internship in the LDS Church History Department, which served as a catalyst to my faith crisis. My spouse and I are happily navigating a mixed-faith marriage. I was a mormon." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"I come from a long line of mormon pioneer ancestry. I was born and raised in a small Southern Utah town, and grew up with the Church as a major part of my upbringing. Served a mission and was married in the Provo City Center Temple. I completed a Bachelor's degree in History at Utah Valley University. As part of my undergraduate training, I did an internship in the LDS Church History Department, which served as a catalyst to my faith crisis. My spouse and I are happily navigating a mixed-faith marriage. I was a mormon." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"The non-whitewashed version of Church history that I learned as an intern revealed a historical record of LDS leaders creating and sustaining systems of oppression, followed by a concerted effort to distort or shelter this information from its membership. It was at this point I realized I could not continue to support a machine that had harmed so many people in the past, and continued to harm others today. I could not continue to hold up a man-made organization with deep flaws as God's "One True Church." My shelf broke." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"The non-whitewashed version of Church history that I learned as an intern revealed a historical record of LDS leaders creating and sustaining systems of oppression, followed by a concerted effort to distort or shelter this information from its membership. It was at this point I realized I could not continue to support a machine that had harmed so many people in the past, and continued to harm others today. I could not continue to hold up a man-made organization with deep flaws as God's "One True Church." My shelf broke." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"This cognitive dissonance would stick with me all the way into my mission, when I was tasked with convincing others that their religious or cultural beliefs were not "true". This never set right with me either, and I probably wasn't the best missionary because of it. I met so many good people from different walks of life and quickly realized, again, how harmful exclusionary beliefs can be." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"This cognitive dissonance would stick with me all the way into my mission, when I was tasked with convincing others that their religious or cultural beliefs were not "true". This never set right with me either, and I probably wasn't the best missionary because of it. I met so many good people from different walks of life and quickly realized, again, how harmful exclusionary beliefs can be." Read Brendan's full wasmormon.org profile at https://wasmormon.org/profile/blee34/
"In looking steadfastly to discern features, I could see none, but a small glimpse would appear in some other place. Below him stood Jesus Christ my Redeemer, in perfect shape like a man—His face was not ablaze, but had the countenance of fire, being bright and shining. His Father’s will appeared to be his! All was condescension, peace, and love!!" - Norris Stearns, Greenfield, Massachusetts, 1815
"In looking steadfastly to discern features, I could see none, but a small glimpse would appear in some other place. Below him stood Jesus Christ my Redeemer, in perfect shape like a man—His face was not ablaze, but had the countenance of fire, being bright and shining. His Father’s will appeared to be his! All was condescension, peace, and love!!" - Norris Stearns, Greenfield, Massachusetts, 1815
"At length, being in an ecstasy of joy, I turned to the other side of the bed, (whether in the body or out I cannot tell, God knoweth) there I saw two spirits, which I knew at the first sight. But if I had the tongue of an Angel I could not describe their glory, for they brought the joys of heaven with them. One was God, my Maker, almost in bodily shape like a man. His face was, as it were a flame of Fire, and his body, as it had been a Pillar and a Cloud." - Norris Stearns, Greenfield, Massachusetts, 1815
"At length, being in an ecstasy of joy, I turned to the other side of the bed, (whether in the body or out I cannot tell, God knoweth) there I saw two spirits, which I knew at the first sight. But if I had the tongue of an Angel I could not describe their glory, for they brought the joys of heaven with them. One was God, my Maker, almost in bodily shape like a man. His face was, as it were a flame of Fire, and his body, as it had been a Pillar and a Cloud." - Norris Stearns, Greenfield, Massachusetts, 1815
"At length, as I lay apparently upon the brink of eternal woe, seeing nothing but death before me, suddenly there came a sweet flow of the love of God to my soul, which gradually increased. At the same time, there appeared a small gleam of light in the room, above the brightness of the sun, then at his meridian, which grew brighter and brighter: As this light and love increased, my sins began to separate, and the Mountain removed towards the east." - Norris Stearns, Greenfield, Massachusetts, 1815
"At length, as I lay apparently upon the brink of eternal woe, seeing nothing but death before me, suddenly there came a sweet flow of the love of God to my soul, which gradually increased. At the same time, there appeared a small gleam of light in the room, above the brightness of the sun, then at his meridian, which grew brighter and brighter: As this light and love increased, my sins began to separate, and the Mountain removed towards the east." - Norris Stearns, Greenfield, Massachusetts, 1815
"I instantly seized hold of this with my heart... but never had the truth been in my mind that faith was a voluntary trust instead of an intellectual state... I knew that it was God's word, and God's voice, as it were, that spoke to me." Charles Grandison Finney, Upstate New York, 1821
"I instantly seized hold of this with my heart... but never had the truth been in my mind that faith was a voluntary trust instead of an intellectual state... I knew that it was God's word, and God's voice, as it were, that spoke to me." Charles Grandison Finney, Upstate New York, 1821
"It seemed to me as if that was binding upon my soul... a great sinking and discouragement came over me... just at that point this passage of Scripture seemed to drop into my mind with a flood of light... "Then shall ye seek me and find me"... Charles Grandison Finney, Upstate New York, 1821
"It seemed to me as if that was binding upon my soul... a great sinking and discouragement came over me... just at that point this passage of Scripture seemed to drop into my mind with a flood of light... "Then shall ye seek me and find me" Charles Grandison Finney, Upstate New York, 1821
"I turned and bent my course toward the woods, feeling that I must be alone, and away from all human eyes and ears, so that I could pour out my prayer to God... I attempted to pray I found that my heart would not pray... when I came to try, I was dumb... In attempting to pray I would hear a rustling in the leaves..." Charles Grandison Finney, Upstate New York, 1821
"I turned and bent my course toward the woods, feeling that I must be alone, and away from all human eyes and ears, so that I could pour out my prayer to God... I attempted to pray I found that my heart would not pray... when I came to try, I was dumb... In attempting to pray I would hear a rustling in the leaves..." Charles Grandison Finney, Upstate New York, 1821
"Some are saying that the church has been hiding the fact that there is more than one version of the first vision – which is just not true. The facts are, we don’t study, we don’t go back and search what has been said on the subject. For example, Dr. James B Allen of BYU, in 1970 produced an article for the church magazines explaining all about the different versions of the first vision." - Elder M Russell Ballard
"Some are saying that the church has been hiding the fact that there is more than one version of the first vision – which is just not true. The facts are, we don’t study, we don’t go back and search what has been said on the subject. For example, Dr. James B Allen of BYU, in 1970 produced an article for the church magazines explaining all about the different versions of the first vision." - Elder M Russell Ballard
"So, just trust us, wherever you are in the world and you share this message with anyone else who raises the question about the church not being transparent. We’re as transparent as we know how to be in telling the truth." - Elder M Russell Ballard
"So, just trust us, wherever you are in the world and you share this message with anyone else who raises the question about the church not being transparent. We’re as transparent as we know how to be in telling the truth." - Elder M Russell Ballard
The Various Elements of Joseph Smith's First Vision, As recorded or Clearly Implied in the Eight Contemporary Accounts (1831-32, 1835, 1838-39, Pratt, Hyde, Wentworth, Spectator, Neibaur) - From the 1970 Improvement Era, where the church printed for the first time is a report on eight different accounts of the First Vision.
The Various Elements of Joseph Smith's First Vision, As recorded or Clearly Implied in the Eight Contemporary Accounts (1831-32, 1835, 1838-39, Pratt, Hyde, Wentworth, Spectator, Neibaur) - From the 1970 Improvement Era, where the church printed for the first time is a report on eight different accounts of the First Vision.
"I have had, and continue to have, many profound moments in my life. Moments where I feel connected to something bigger than myself. Moments where I am in awe of the enormosity of the universe. I am amazed at all humans have accomplished, and continue to accomplish in spite of great odds." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I have had, and continue to have, many profound moments in my life. Moments where I feel connected to something bigger than myself. Moments where I am in awe of the enormosity of the universe. I am amazed at all humans have accomplished, and continue to accomplish in spite of great odds." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I thought I believed in non-denominational Christianity, but once you've "seen the man behind the curtain", you see him everywhere. I believe humans invented gods to explain what science couldn't yet explain. Gods are used to control the masses." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I thought I believed in non-denominational Christianity, but once you've "seen the man behind the curtain", you see him everywhere. I believe humans invented gods to explain what science couldn't yet explain. Gods are used to control the masses." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I was offended by the $150 BILLION hoard. Actually that came after I left, I was offended that my agency was taken from me. My ability to make informed decisions. That my family couldn't see me be married. That I could not be trusted with any kind of authority or have expertise because I don't have a penis." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I was offended by the $150 BILLION hoard. Actually that came after I left, I was offended that my agency was taken from me. My ability to make informed decisions. That my family couldn't see me be married. That I could not be trusted with any kind of authority or have expertise because I don't have a penis." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"The short answer why I left? Integrity. The church became something I no longer recognized. Jesus had been replaced by Corporate Mormon Jesus. It is not loving or forgiving, but most importantly, they are unrepentant. So I had to leave. A church that could not abide by the same rules its members are subject to cannot be God's church. Not the God I believed in." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"The short answer why I left? Integrity. The church became something I no longer recognized. Jesus had been replaced by Corporate Mormon Jesus. It is not loving or forgiving, but most importantly, they are unrepentant. So I had to leave. A church that could not abide by the same rules its members are subject to cannot be God's church. Not the God I believed in." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I was a mormon for 43 years. Now I'm not. Now I live my values with integrity. Stoic philosophy reminds me to have balance and fortitude. The courage to admit when I'm wrong. And it's ok to not have all the answers." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I was a mormon for 43 years. Now I'm not. Now I live my values with integrity. Stoic philosophy reminds me to have balance and fortitude. The courage to admit when I'm wrong. And it's ok to not have all the answers." Continue reading Sally's full "I was a mormon" story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sallygirl75/
"I learned Mormonism had a messy and complicated past early on in my time in the Church. But as time went on I came to grips with other issues that further complicated my beliefs. I started my podcast "Mormon Discussion" as a believer and sitting Bishop, with the goal to explore Mormon history. Over the span of 5 years I learned so many things the Church chose not to tell me that deeply pointed to it not being what it claimed." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"I learned Mormonism had a messy and complicated past early on in my time in the Church. But as time went on I came to grips with other issues that further complicated my beliefs. I started my podcast "Mormon Discussion" as a believer and sitting Bishop, with the goal to explore Mormon history. Over the span of 5 years I learned so many things the Church chose not to tell me that deeply pointed to it not being what it claimed." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"It can be scary wondering what now when you deconstruct the faith you grew up in and/or had your identity tied to. For me and my family, we are happier. We live more abundantly. Outside the Church we can love each other and other humans more fully. We welcome diversity and differences." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"It can be scary wondering what now when you deconstruct the faith you grew up in and/or had your identity tied to. For me and my family, we are happier. We live more abundantly. Outside the Church we can love each other and other humans more fully. We welcome diversity and differences." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"What makes us different is way more real than what makes us the same. People are broken but such is not bad. Outside the Church we have been able to be more vulnerable. More authentic. More real. And we make safe space for others to do the same. We show up. We lean in. And we try to be present each and every moment." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"What makes us different is way more real than what makes us the same. People are broken but such is not bad. Outside the Church we have been able to be more vulnerable. More authentic. More real. And we make safe space for others to do the same. We show up. We lean in. And we try to be present each and every moment." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"I slowly deconstructed my entire belief system and lost faith in Mormonism's truth claims and in Mormonism's ability to be healthy to others if those healthy interactions would damage the institutional Church. In the beginning I thought I was having a faith crisis. That wasn't true. I wanted Mormonism to be truth more than anything else. If anything maybe I cared too much. Instead the Church had a truth crisis." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"I slowly deconstructed my entire belief system and lost faith in Mormonism's truth claims and in Mormonism's ability to be healthy to others if those healthy interactions would damage the institutional Church. In the beginning I thought I was having a faith crisis. That wasn't true. I wanted Mormonism to be truth more than anything else. If anything maybe I cared too much. Instead the Church had a truth crisis." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"I had to come to grips that the Church shielding its members and the public generally from learning the complicated history was at least in large part intentional. This was hard. Once I dealt with that I was opened up to whether the truth claims of my beloved faith truly held up against the history and against thinking rationally and logically." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
"I had to come to grips that the Church shielding its members and the public generally from learning the complicated history was at least in large part intentional. This was hard. Once I dealt with that I was opened up to whether the truth claims of my beloved faith truly held up against the history and against thinking rationally and logically." - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
I was a 17 year-old convert to the Church. Got married in the Washington D.C. Temple, served in leadership calling after leadership calling and at 29 years old was called to serve as a Bishop of a small mid-western ward in Ohio. I love to read books, listen to podcasts, and learn new things. I love faith development, Mormon history, my family, and being with the most awesome friends on the planet. I was a Mormon. - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/
I was a 17 year-old convert to the Church. Got married in the Washington D.C. Temple, served in leadership calling after leadership calling and at 29 years old was called to serve as a Bishop of a small mid-western ward in Ohio. I love to read books, listen to podcasts, and learn new things. I love faith development, Mormon history, my family, and being with the most awesome friends on the planet. I was a Mormon. - Bill Reel https://wasmormon.org/profile/bill-reel/