June, 2025 - wasmormon.org

I'm Erin. I was born in SLC and moved to Vernal, UT when I was three. I grew up very Mormon. Very active, very believing. - Erin's "I was a Mormon" story. Read more at https://wasmormon.org/profile/sistercushing/

John Taylor’s Hidden 1886 Polygamy Revelation

“My son John, you have asked me concerning the New and Everlasting Covenant how far it is binding upon my people. Thus saith the Lord: All commandments that I give must be obeyed by those calling themselves by my name unless they are revoked by me or by my authority, and how can I revoke an everlasting covenant, for I the Lord am everlasting and my everlasting covenants cannot be abrogated nor done away with, but they stand forever. ... I have not revoked this law, nor will I, for it is everlasting, and those who will enter into my glory must obey the conditions thereof; even so, Amen.” - John Taylor, LDS Church President, 1886 Revelation | wasmormon.org

In 1886, then-LDS Church president John Taylor claimed to receive a direct revelation from God reaffirming that plural marriage was an eternal, unchangeable law. This divine directive—written in his own hand—declared that the New and Everlasting Covenant (a.k.a. polygamy) could never be revoked, even under government pressure. But just a few years later, in 1890, …

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This is a spotlight on a profile shared at wasmormon.org. These are just the highlights, so please find the full story at https://wasmormon.org/profile/brian-caulfield/. There are stories of Mormon faith journeys contributed by hundreds of users like you. Come check them out and consider sharing your own story at wasmormon.org!

There were times when I did believe in the church 100%. That was paying money, and following the rules. I left due to leaders and Bishops spreading lies. And finding out Jesus was not Jesus. - Brian's "I was a Mormon" story. Read more at https://wasmormon.org/profile/brian-caulfield/

I'm a fun loving guy who had plenty of girlfriends. I was 14 or 15 years old for my first date, first kiss at 19, and I was a virgin until the age of 31. - Brian's "I was a Mormon" story. Read more at https://wasmormon.org/profile/brian-caulfield/

Hi, I'm Brian. I like basketball, martial arts, dance, and rock music. I served a mission in London, 1998, when I was 19. I'm diabetic type 1, dyspraxic, and autistic. I was a Mormon. - Brian's "I was a Mormon" story. Read more at https://wasmormon.org/profile/brian-caulfield/

“There was a hint of Mormonism in Smith's advocacy of patriarchal guardianship, and possibly a use of the concept of plural wives from Utah to justify Smith's position. The Los Angeles Star described Hannah as Biddy's sister and also as "… a woman nearly white, whose children are all nearly so, one of whose daughters (of eight years) cannot easily be distinguished from the white race." In addition to being Smith's slaves, some of Hannah's children may indeed have been his own offspring, or perhaps Cottrell's. The judge observed: "… the said Robert Smith from his past relation to them as members of his family does possess and exercise over them an undue influence in respect to the matter of their said removal inso far that they have been in duress and not in possession and exercise of their free will so as to give a binding consent to any engagement or arrange ment with him."” - Dolores Hayden, Biddy Mason’s Los Angeles 1856-1891. California History, Fall 1989 | wasmormon.org — “There was a hint of Mormonism in Smith's advocacy of patriarchal guardianship, and possibly a use of the concept of plural wives from Utah to justify Smith's position. The Los Angeles Star described Hannah as Biddy's sister and also as "… a woman nearly white, whose children are all nearly so, one of whose daughters (of eight years) cannot easily be distinguished from the white race." In addition to being Smith's slaves, some of Hannah's children may indeed have been his own offspring, or perhaps Cottrell's. The judge observed: "… the said Robert Smith from his past relation to them as members of his family does possess and exercise over them an undue influence in respect to the matter of their said removal inso far that they have been in duress and not in possession and exercise of their free will so as to give a binding consent to any engagement or arrange ment with him."” - Dolores Hayden, Biddy Mason’s Los Angeles 1856-1891. California History, Fall 1989

“In the fall of 1851, the San Bernardino Valley was transformed ... into the largest predominantly Anglo-American settlement in the California southland with the arrival of some 400 Latter-day Saints... The group also included an entire branch of Southern converts, some of whom had given up plantations and come west, bringing with them their African-American servants, including slaves who ultimately received their freedom. This diverse group of colonists, unified by their faith, was well suited to help establish a community where all were welcome and all worked together.... The new community was ethnically diverse. In addition to the LDS pioneers of European descent, there were African-Americans, including colony midwives Biddy Mason and Hannah Smith, who was noted for her daring rides on horseback in the middle of the night to “catch babies.”... Today, descendants of the early African-American pioneers recount stories of good will between their forefathers and the Latter-day Saint pioneers. The enduring strength of such family traditions is a testament to the community spirit of the San Bernardino colony.” - Ensign, February 2003: True Community: Latter-day Saints in San Bernardino, 1851–1857 | wasmormon.org — “In the fall of 1851, the San Bernardino Valley was transformed ... into the largest predominantly Anglo-American settlement in the California southland with the arrival of some 400 Latter-day Saints... The group also included an entire branch of Southern converts, some of whom had given up plantations and come west, bringing with them their African-American servants, including slaves who ultimately received their freedom. This diverse group of colonists, unified by their faith, was well suited to help establish a community where all were welcome and all worked together.... The new community was ethnically diverse. In addition to the LDS pioneers of European descent, there were African-Americans, including colony midwives Biddy Mason and Hannah Smith, who was noted for her daring rides on horseback in the middle of the night to “catch babies.”... Today, descendants of the early African-American pioneers recount stories of good will between their forefathers and the Latter-day Saint pioneers. The enduring strength of such family traditions is a testament to the community spirit of the San Bernardino colony.” - Ensign, February 2003: True Community: Latter-day Saints in San Bernardino, 1851–1857

“I have always done what I am told to do; I have always feared this trip to Texas since I first heard of it. Mr. Smith told me I would be as free in Texas as here.” - Biddy Mason, Private Testimony to Judge Hayes in Mason v Smith Court Proceedings | wasmormon.org — “I have always done what I am told to do; I have always feared this trip to Texas since I first heard of it. Mr. Smith told me I would be as free in Texas as here.” - Biddy Mason, Private Testimony to Judge Hayes in Mason v Smith Court Proceedings

“Between 1848 and 1851, Smith's household, including his slaves, settled in Utah in the Salt Lake Basin. The Mormons were generally outspoken in their belief in the inferiority of Blacks and women. Biddy and Hannah were not recognized as independent family heads, but remained with Smith's household as slaves. Given the Mormon practice of polygamy, Black women's status as slaves or indentured servants of a Southern master not only remained low, but there was also a religious justification for any sexual exploitation a master wished to enforce.” - Dolores Hayden, Biddy Mason’s Los Angeles 1856-1891. California History, Fall 1989 | wasmormon.org — “Between 1848 and 1851, Smith's household, including his slaves, settled in Utah in the Salt Lake Basin. The Mormons were generally outspoken in their belief in the inferiority of Blacks and women. Biddy and Hannah were not recognized as independent family heads, but remained with Smith's household as slaves. Given the Mormon practice of polygamy, Black women's status as slaves or indentured servants of a Southern master not only remained low, but there was also a religious justification for any sexual exploitation a master wished to enforce.” - Dolores Hayden, Biddy Mason’s Los Angeles 1856-1891. California History, Fall 1989

“If you hold your hand closed, nothing good can come in. The open hand is blessed, for it gives in abundance, even as it receives.” - Biddy Mason | wasmormon.org — “If you hold your hand closed, nothing good can come in. The open hand is blessed, for it gives in abundance, even as it receives.” - Biddy Mason

"And it further appearing by satisfactory proof to the judge here, that all of the said persons of color are entitled to their freedom, and are free and cannot be held in slavery or involuntary servitude, it is therefore argued that they are entitled to their freedom and are free forever." - Benjamin Ignatius Hayes, California District Court Judge - Biddy Mason v Smith, 1856 | wasmormon.org — "And it further appearing by satisfactory proof to the judge here, that all of the said persons of color are entitled to their freedom, and are free and cannot be held in slavery or involuntary servitude, it is therefore argued that they are entitled to their freedom and are free forever." - Benjamin Ignatius Hayes, California District Court Judge - Biddy Mason v Smith, 1856

“Bro W. Snow will loose some influence through that affair. The circumstances are like this Thomas Lewis was under arrest and on the way to the City to be taken to the penetentionary. They were taking him in the night and while passing Willow Creek some men came out and took him into the willows and took from him his stones in a brutal manner, tearing the chords right out, leaving him on the ground when it was covered with snow and a bitter cold night. He was out 48 hours before found and it is a miracle that he lived. He lingered a long time and now is gone crazy. What a severe trial to that good woman his mother Sister Lewis.” - Samuel Pitchforth, Diary, May 31, 1857 | wasmormon.org — “Bro W. Snow will loose some influence through that affair. The circumstances are like this Thomas Lewis was under arrest and on the way to the City to be taken to the penetentionary. They were taking him in the night and while passing Willow Creek some men came out and took him into the willows and took from him his stones in a brutal manner, tearing the chords right out, leaving him on the ground when it was covered with snow and a bitter cold night. He was out 48 hours before found and it is a miracle that he lived. He lingered a long time and now is gone crazy. What a severe trial to that good woman his mother Sister Lewis.” - Samuel Pitchforth, Diary, May 31, 1857

“Warren Snow was Bishop of the Church at Manti, San Pete County, Utah. He had several wives, but there was a fair, buxom young woman in the town that Snow wanted for a wife... She thanked him for the honor offered, but told him she was then engaged to a young man, a member of the Church, and consequently could not marry the old priest. This was no sufficient reason to Snow. He told her it was the will of God that she should marry him, and she must do so... Then the authorities called on the young man and directed him to give up the young woman. This he steadfastly refused to do... He remained true to his intended, and said he would die before he would surrender his intended wife to the embraces of another.” - John D. Lee, Mormonism Unveiled: The life and confessions of the late Mormon bishop, 1877 | wasmormon.org — “Warren Snow was Bishop of the Church at Manti, San Pete County, Utah. He had several wives, but there was a fair, buxom young woman in the town that Snow wanted for a wife... She thanked him for the honor offered, but told him she was then engaged to a young man, a member of the Church, and consequently could not marry the old priest. This was no sufficient reason to Snow. He told her it was the will of God that she should marry him, and she must do so... Then the authorities called on the young man and directed him to give up the young woman. This he steadfastly refused to do... He remained true to his intended, and said he would die before he would surrender his intended wife to the embraces of another.” - John D. Lee, Mormonism Unveiled: The life and confessions of the late Mormon bishop, 1877

“It was then decided to call a meeting of the people who lived true to counsel... The young man was there, and was again requested, ordered and threatened, to get him to surrender the young woman to Snow, but ... he refused to consent to give up the girl. The lights were then put out. An attack was made on the young man. He was severely beaten, and then tied with his back down on a bench, when Bishop Snow took a bowie-knife, and performed the operation in a most brutal manner, and then took the portion severed from his victim and hung it up in the schoolhouse on a nail, so that it could be seen by all who visited the house afterwards. The party then left the young man weltering in his blood, and in a lifeless condition.” - John D. Lee, Mormonism Unveiled: The life and confessions of the late Mormon bishop, 1877 | wasmormon.org — “It was then decided to call a meeting of the people who lived true to counsel... The young man was there, and was again requested, ordered and threatened, to get him to surrender the young woman to Snow, but ... he refused to consent to give up the girl. The lights were then put out. An attack was made on the young man. He was severely beaten, and then tied with his back down on a bench, when Bishop Snow took a bowie-knife, and performed the operation in a most brutal manner, and then took the portion severed from his victim and hung it up in the schoolhouse on a nail, so that it could be seen by all who visited the house afterwards. The party then left the young man weltering in his blood, and in a lifeless condition.” - John D. Lee, Mormonism Unveiled: The life and confessions of the late Mormon bishop, 1877

It was then determined that the rebellious young man must be forced by harsh treatment to respect the advice and orders of the Priesthood. His fate was left to Bishop Snow for his decision. He decided that the young man should be castrated; Snow saying, "When that is done, he will not be liable to want the girl badly, and she will listen to reason when she knows that her lover is no longer a man." - John D. Lee, Mormonism Unveiled: The life and confessions of the late Mormon bishop, 1877 | wasmomon.org — It was then determined that the rebellious young man must be forced by harsh treatment to respect the advice and orders of the Priesthood. His fate was left to Bishop Snow for his decision. He decided that the young man should be castrated; Snow saying, "When that is done, he will not be liable to want the girl badly, and she will listen to reason when she knows that her lover is no longer a man." - John D. Lee, Mormonism Unveiled: The life and confessions of the late Mormon bishop, 1877

“While being transported to the penitentiary, according to his mother, Elizabeth Jones, Lewis “was taken out of the wagon a blanket put round his head & ... like a pig by taking his testicles clean out & he laid at this place in a dangerous state he was out two nights & part of two days before he was found.” Manti bishop Warren Snow had ordered her son’s castration... she asked the church president if her son’s punishment was “right and righteous.”... Though he condoned it afterward, it is uncertain whether Young had authorized Thomas Lewis’s castration in advance.” - John G. Turner, Brigham Young - Pioneer Prophet, 2012 | wasmormon.org — “While being transported to the penitentiary, according to his mother, Elizabeth Jones, Lewis “was taken out of the wagon a blanket put round his head & ... like a pig by taking his testicles clean out & he laid at this place in a dangerous state he was out two nights & part of two days before he was found.” Manti bishop Warren Snow had ordered her son’s castration... she asked the church president if her son’s punishment was “right and righteous.”... Though he condoned it afterward, it is uncertain whether Young had authorized Thomas Lewis’s castration in advance.” - John G. Turner, Brigham Young - Pioneer Prophet, 2012

“On a cold winter night, Warren, the entire Manti Bishopric, and a few others secreted themselves in some willows near a creek by which the road to Salt Lake City passed. Thomas Lewis, a young member of the church ... was being taken by night to the penitentiary in Salt Lake ... When Lewis and his escort reached the creek, Warren and the others stepped out of the willows, and pulling Lewis from his horse, they dragged him into the brush and emasculated him "in a brutal manner." The prisoner's escort seems to have been an accomplice (hence the night trip), and soon the entire group fled leaving their victim lying on the snow-covered ground on what was described as "a bitter cold night." Lewis laid there in a near senseless condition for forty-eight hours before being found by someone who took him in and saved his life.” - John A. Peterson, "Warren Stone Snow: Mormon defender," Master's Thesis, BYU, 1985 | wasmormon.org — “On a cold winter night, Warren, the entire Manti Bishopric, and a few others secreted themselves in some willows near a creek by which the road to Salt Lake City passed. Thomas Lewis, a young member of the church ... was being taken by night to the penitentiary in Salt Lake ... When Lewis and his escort reached the creek, Warren and the others stepped out of the willows, and pulling Lewis from his horse, they dragged him into the brush and emasculated him "in a brutal manner." The prisoner's escort seems to have been an accomplice (hence the night trip), and soon the entire group fled leaving their victim lying on the snow-covered ground on what was described as "a bitter cold night." Lewis laid there in a near senseless condition for forty-eight hours before being found by someone who took him in and saved his life.” - John A. Peterson, "Warren Stone Snow: Mormon defender," Master's Thesis, BYU, 1985

“Among the victims to priestly hatred and jealousy was a young man about twenty years of age, in San Pete County, named Thomas Lewis... he was quite attentive to a young lady-friend... It happened that Snow, the Bishop of the ward in which the Lewis family lived, had cast his patriarchal eye on this young girl, and designed her for himself... Lewis's doom was sealed at once... The closest espionage was kept upon him by the Bishop's band of ruffians, and one evening a favorable opportunity presented itself; he was waylaid, and the Bishop's sentence carried out, which was to inflict on the boy an injury so brutal and barbarous that no woman's pen may write the words that describe it.” - Ann Eliza Young, Wife No.19, Brigham Young's Apostate Wife, 1876 | wasmormon.org — “Among the victims to priestly hatred and jealousy was a young man about twenty years of age, in San Pete County, named Thomas Lewis... he was quite attentive to a young lady-friend... It happened that Snow, the Bishop of the ward in which the Lewis family lived, had cast his patriarchal eye on this young girl, and designed her for himself... Lewis's doom was sealed at once... The closest espionage was kept upon him by the Bishop's band of ruffians, and one evening a favorable opportunity presented itself; he was waylaid, and the Bishop's sentence carried out, which was to inflict on the boy an injury so brutal and barbarous that no woman's pen may write the words that describe it.” - Ann Eliza Young, Wife No.19, Brigham Young's Apostate Wife, 1876

Bishop Warren S. Snow’s Teenage Brides and The Castration of Thomas Lewis

In 1857, just as tensions with the U.S. government were escalating toward the Utah War, a dark and largely forgotten episode of Mormon frontier justice played out in Manti, Utah. It involved a young man named Thomas Lewis, potentially an unnamed teenage girl, and Warren S. Snow, a high-ranking Mormon bishop and militia leader. What …

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“After having expressed myself so freely upon this subject, I do not doubt but those who have been forward in raising their voice against the South, will cry out against me as being uncharitable, unfeeling and unkind—wholly unacquainted with the gospel of Christ. It is my privilege then, to name certain passages from the bible, and examine the teachings of the ancients upon this matter, as the fact is uncontrovertable, that the first mention we have of slavery is found in the holy bible, pronounced by a man who was perfect in his generation and walked with God. And so far from that prediction’s being averse from the mind of God it remains as a lasting monument of the decree of Jehovah, to the shame and confusion of all who have cried out against the South, in consequence of their holding the sons of Ham in servitude!” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836 | wasmormon.org — “After having expressed myself so freely upon this subject, I do not doubt but those who have been forward in raising their voice against the South, will cry out against me as being uncharitable, unfeeling and unkind—wholly unacquainted with the gospel of Christ. It is my privilege then, to name certain passages from the bible, and examine the teachings of the ancients upon this matter, as the fact is uncontrovertable, that the first mention we have of slavery is found in the holy bible, pronounced by a man who was perfect in his generation and walked with God. And so far from that prediction’s being averse from the mind of God it remains as a lasting monument of the decree of Jehovah, to the shame and confusion of all who have cried out against the South, in consequence of their holding the sons of Ham in servitude!” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836

“I do not believe that the people of the North have any more right to say that the South shall not hold slaves, than the South have to say the North shall.... When I see persons in the free states signing documents against slavery, it is no less, in my mind, than an array of influence, and a declaration of hostilities against the people of the South!” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836 | wasmormon.org — “I do not believe that the people of the North have any more right to say that the South shall not hold slaves, than the South have to say the North shall.... When I see persons in the free states signing documents against slavery, it is no less, in my mind, than an array of influence, and a declaration of hostilities against the people of the South!” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836

“No one will pretend to say, that the people of the free states are as capable of knowing the evils of slavery as those who hold them. If slavery is an evil, who, could we expect, would first learn it? Would the people of the free states, or would the slave states? All must readily admit, that the latter would first learn this fact.” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836 | wasmormon.org — “No one will pretend to say, that the people of the free states are as capable of knowing the evils of slavery as those who hold them. If slavery is an evil, who, could we expect, would first learn it? Would the people of the free states, or would the slave states? All must readily admit, that the latter would first learn this fact.” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836

“Search the book of Covenants, in which you will see the belief of the church concerning masters and servants... we have no right to interfere with slaves contrary to the mind and will of their masters. In fact, it would be much better and more prudent, not to preach at all to slaves, until after their masters are converted: and then, teach the master to use them with kindness... and that servants are bound to serve their masters, with singleness of heart, without murmuring. I do, most sincerely hope, that no one who is authorized from this church to preach the gospel, will so far depart from the scripture as to be found stirring up strife and sedition against our brethren of the South.” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836 | wasmormon.org — “Search the book of Covenants, in which you will see the belief of the church concerning masters and servants... we have no right to interfere with slaves contrary to the mind and will of their masters. In fact, it would be much better and more prudent, not to preach at all to slaves, until after their masters are converted: and then, teach the master to use them with kindness... and that servants are bound to serve their masters, with singleness of heart, without murmuring. I do, most sincerely hope, that no one who is authorized from this church to preach the gospel, will so far depart from the scripture as to be found stirring up strife and sedition against our brethren of the South.” - Joseph Smith, Letter to Oliver Cowdery, April 9, 1836

Joseph Smith on Slavery

In recent years, LDS apostle Quentin L. Cook has claimed that early members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints were persecuted because they were abolitionists and anti-slavery. Today leaders promote the narrative that latter-day saints of the day were driven out of Missouri in significant part because they were opposed to slavery. …

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Leadership Suppress Dissenfecting Light – The Nauvoo Expositor

“On Friday, June 7, 1844, dissenters from the Church published the one and only issue of an opposition newspaper they called the Nauvoo Expositor... The dissenters... voiced their discontent with the practice of plural marriage, Joseph Smith’s teachings on the nature of God from his recent King Follett sermon, and his mixing of religious and civic authority in Nauvoo.” - LDS Website: Church History Topics: Nauvoo Expositor | wasmormon.org

On June 7, 1844, a bold and short-lived newspaper called the Nauvoo Expositor published its first—and only—issue in Nauvoo, Illinois. It was created by former Mormon insiders who could no longer remain silent. They leveled charges against Joseph Smith, including abuse of power, political tyranny, and most explosively, his secret polygamy. The Nauvoo Expositor printed …

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The church’s whitewashed, faith-promoting history glosses over many crucial parts of Green Flake’s story. It omits that in Nauvoo, the Flake family donated his slave labor to help build the temple. It skips the fact that he was sent west not as a free pioneer, but to perform slave duties—and that when he arrived in the Salt Lake Valley, he plowed the land, planted the first crops, and built a log cabin, all in preparation for the arrival of his enslavers. The church also fails to mention that Green was later given to the church itself as tithing and “served” Brigham Young as a personal servant—a euphemism for slave—for at least a year. Even his eventual emancipation is left unspoken, likely because the details remain unclear and uncomfortable to confront.

In 1851, his mother and family went with C. C. Rich and A. M. Lyman to settle San Bernardino. Previous to going she gave her negro slave Green Flake (one of the Pioneers of 1847) to the Church as tithing. He then worked two years for Pres Young and Heber C. Kimball, and then got his liberty and settled near Union. - William J. Flake, February 14, 1894 | wasmormon.org — In 1851, his mother and family went with C. C. Rich and A. M. Lyman to settle San Bernardino. Previous to going she gave her negro slave Green Flake (one of the Pioneers of 1847) to the Church as tithing. He then worked two years for Pres Young and Heber C. Kimball, and then got his liberty and settled near Union. - William J. Flake, February 14, 1894

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